The Way Back Home
by Rustic Capitals
Summary: Amy has finally graduated college. But a lot has change since she's left for New York 4 years ago.
1. Chapter 1

**New Secret Life FanFic Coming Soon :)**

**Teaser**

_"OMG Ricky I've never said anything like that, don't start putting words…"_

_"This isn't going anywhere"_ Ricky said cutting Amy off _"lets just say have him back home by Friday"_

_"Fine"_

_"Okay let me talk to him"_

"_He's sleeping, I'll let him call you when he wakes up_".

Amy hung up before Ricky could reply.


	2. Chapter 2

Ricky sleepily grabbed the cell phone, loudly buzzing on the night stand located beside his bed. It was still dark outside and the bright illuminating screen, made him squint from the brightness. The time on the phone blinked 6:30, which meant it was time to get up and get ready for work. Pressing the dismissed button on his phone, the noise stopped and he rolled over to see a dark haired sleeping beauty still fast asleep. He kissed the top of her forehead and rolled out of bed to take a shower.

By the time Ricky got out of the shower, Adrian had already gotten up and was downstairs making breakfast, talking to John. Quickly he got dressed and made his way downstairs.

_"Hey Bud"_ Ricky said, as he gave his son an affectionate rub on the head, messing up his hair.

"_Dad, quit it!,_ _I'm not 3 anymore_" John said a bit frustrated. He was getting too old for head rubs and it was a habit his dad can't seem to break.

Ricky ignored this and gave Adrian a quick peck on the cheek, before reaching in the cupboard for a mug to make his morning coffee.

_"Dad, what time are you dropping me off at Grandpas today?"_

Ricky froze. Not because he had to drop off John with George and Kathleen. He was there almost every weekend. But today was different. Today, Amy was coming home from New York. Which meant a whole lot of things, which Ricky has been avoiding thinking about. Truth be told, it would be best if he never had to think about those things at all. Their lives have been pretty great the past few years, and he would be satisfied with things not having to change. But Amy coming home permanently from New York meant new arrangements.

_"Daaaaddd!" _John said whining, when his dad didn't reply.

_"oh sorry bud" _Ricky said, snapping out of his thoughts, "_I'll bring you over right after I pick you up from school_" Ricky said a bit distracted.

_"I wish it was afterschool right now! Then I get to go the airport and see mom!"_

"_Alright, well you'll have to get ready for school first. Why don't you go and get your stuff together, we gotta get going soon"_ Ricky told the 7 year old.

As soon as John was out of sight, Adrian turned and wrapped her arms around her boyfriend.

_"You alright?"_ Adrian asked, after John had run of to get his things ready for school.

Ricky rested his hands on Adrians waist and kissed the bridge of her nose_ "Yeah, it's just from this point on, I feel like things are just going to get weird_"

_"You think?" _Adrian asked staring right into Ricky's eyes.

_"Well for one thing, Amy's going to want to revisit the arrangement with John"_

Adrian had always tried to respect the fact that whatever decisions were made about John was solely Ricky and Amy's business. Like how much time Amy got him whenever she came down to visit. Or George taking him to New York for a few weeks with only a month's notice. She's never really said anything, even though there were times where she thought that they were bending over backwards for Amy's sake. But this time, she felt the urge to say something.

_"Well why do things have to change?"_ Adrian said_. "John has his routine, this has been his life since she left, I think she needs to take that into consideration. Just because she's John's mother doesn't mean she gets all the say."_

_"Well of course not, no one is saying she does, but things will obviously change"_ Ricky said.

Adrian was about to say something else, but John walked in with his coat and backpack on.

"_okay time to go!"_ John exclaimed.

_"Alright I'll see you after I drop of John with George_" Ricky said, quickly giving Adrian a kiss before grabbing his cup of coffee and heading out the door with his son.


	3. Chapter 3

Amy impatiently waited for her second luggage to come out of the carrousel. She had just spent hours on a plane and this time she was coming home for good, degree in hand. She couldn't describe what she was feeling at that moment. It was as if there was a massive ball of energy, trapped inside her and she would burst any moment if she couldn't let it out.

She did it. To say that it was a very difficult past 4 years, would be the understatement of the year. But she did what she set out to do in New York. She got her degree in journalism, Suma Cum Lade and now she was home and couldn't wait to see her family.

Finally she spotted a black luggage, with a massive red Hudson bumper sticker slapped right in the middle. She chuckled as she remembered her roommate, putting it on there. "_You'll thank me, when you realize you don't have to spend hours trying to locate yours in a sea of a thousand other black luggage_" she said. Amy just shook her head, because frankly she had been exactly right.

Luggage in hand, she sprinted through the airport to where her family was waiting for her. However, there was one special person she was most excited to see. She walked out from behind a crowd of people, stretching her neck to look for any sign of John and her parents.

_"MOMMY! MOMMYYY!" _

Amy could recognize that voice anywhere. When she finally spotted him, she was a bit taken a back to see who else was waiting with her son. There was her dad and Kathleen along with her mom and Robbie of course, but she was also surprised to see Ben, Henry and Alice, holding balloons and a massive welcome home sign. Her eyes automatically went straight to the little boy sitting on her dad's shoulders, holding his own little welcome home sign and a single rose. She ran straight to them, her dad setting John down so he could give his mom a running hug.

All that balled up energy inside her almost diffused as lifted her son in a tight hug.

_"Oh I missed you so so so so much" _

_"I missed you mommy! This is for you!"_

_"Welcome back Aimes"_ George said patting his daughter on the shoulder while Amy continued to hug John.

_"Welcome home baby"_ her mother said wrapping her arms around both John and Amy and giving her daughter a kiss on the head.

After a few minutes, Amy's mom pulled away and Amy set John down.

_"Heeeeeyy you!"_ Ben said smiling

_"Omg I can't believe you guys are here! Ben I thought you were still in New York?"_ Amy said reaching to give him a hug.

"_Technically, I'm still there. I flew back last week after finals to help my dad out with something. But I still have the apartment until the end of summer, which I'm planning to take full advantage of" _Ben said with a mischievous grin.

_"And…Alice!"_

_"Yeah well we figured you deserved a nice welcome party" _Alice said, as Amy pulled her into a hug.

"_Ditto_" was all Henry replied, when he got his turn for a hug.

_"And omg congratulations you two, I never got a chance to speak to you after I heard the news. Let me see your ring!"_ Amy said as Alice lifted up her left hand to show off a modest looking diamond.

_"Omg its so pretty. You done good there Henry"_ Amy said, giving Henry an affectionate punch on the arm.

Henry smiled proudly, putting his arms around his fiancé. _"Thanks Amy, glad you approve"_

_"Alright what do we all say we get out of here and continue this mini celebration at the house. I have a whole bunch of frozen meat in the freezer from the restaurant, enough for a nice big barbeque dinner" _George said

The small crowd cheered and the group started making their way out of the airport as they continued to chat excitedly amongst each other.


	4. Chapter 4

Ricky and Adrian were enjoying some good adult alone time, while John was with Amy at George's house.

"_Mmmm you are too good, Mr. Underwood_" Adrian groaned, resting her head on Ricky's bare chest. Ricky was lying flat on his back, his left arm, around Adrian.

Ricky responded by kissing the top of her head. "_I think you're giving me too much credit_" Ricky said in an equally flirtatious tone. Before Adrian had a chance to reply, Ricky's phone rang.

_"Ignore it"_

_"Tempting but it could be John"_

Just as he thought, the caller ID showed 'George', and Ricky swiped the display on the phone to answer.

_"Hey George"_

_"Hey there buddy"_ George replied on the other end_. "I was just calling to see if there was any particular time you needed John back"_

John had been with Amy for a week now, since the family had picked her up from the airport. They hadn't really discussed an arrangement. John being off school for the summer, there was no real need for him to come back right away and George house was practically John's second home. Both Ricky and Adrian had to work so it worked out. Ricky still hasn't spoken or seen Amy. Every communication was made through George. When Ricky wanted to speak to John he would call George. This has been pretty much the way its been since Amy left to go to school in New York. He's barely spoken to her in the past 3 years, except for any major things, like birthdays and holidays.

_"Well what were you guys thinking?" _ Ricky said, his arm still around Adrian. Adrian was now giving him small pecks of kisses on his chest.

"_Amy's fixing him breakfast right now, and I think she was saying it would be nice to keep him here with us for maybe another week, if you guys were cool with that"_

_"I don't know George…"_ Ricky's voice trail off.

_"Yeah I get it, listen, it doesn't even make sense why I'm the one talking to you about this. It should really be Amy, one sec, I'm going to get her on the phone, then you both can figure out what you guys want to do"_

Ricky stayed on the line. He stroked Adrian's hair while he waited, twisting a few strands between his fingers. He can hear George making his way through the house.

_"What's going on?"_ Adrian whispered, having only heard one side of the conversation

"_Amy wants to keep him there for another week…George is getting Amy on the…"_

_"Hey Ricky"_ George came back on the line _"Amy is just tied up right now, but said she'll touch base with you later today, if that's cool"_

Ricky sighed. He really wanted to just talk and figure out what was going on regarding John, but went along _"Uhm yeah sure George, but please, make sure she does call me" _

George reassured him that he would see to it Amy called and both said their goodbyes.

It was late afternoon, close to dinner time. Amy and John had both gotten up early that day. They spent the early hours watching cartoon re runs. After breakfast the two spent the rest of their days out. Amy was just as tired, but remembered that she promised her dad she would call Ricky and make plans regarding John. She also wanted to discuss custody arrangements now that she was back full time. But that would have to wait another day.

Amy scrolled down her phone list, until she found Ricky's contact, though despite having rarely called it in years, she can dial his number by memory. It's funny the kind of things that would stick to your memory. Like her old high school student number for one. Its been years since she's needed to use it, yet after 4 years of having to know it for every little thing, those 7 digits seem to be permanently embedded in her memory.

The line rang, and she waited for someone to pick up on the other end.

"_Amy_?" Ricky's voice sent a nervous shiver up her spine, which she immediately shrugged off and forced out of her mind.

"_Uh, hey Ricky, I was just calling to talk to you about John_". She didn't know why but she was exerting a lot of energy to sound as cool as possible, but her voice was teetering on shaking. 'It's just because you haven't spoken to him directly in so long', she thought to herself, trying to justify her feelings. Also, Amy didn't want to even have this conversation at all, let alone having a conversation with Ricky, period. She decided to get straight to the point and keep it as painless and as short as possible.

"G_ood, I'd been wondering about when you were thinking of bringing him home_" Ricky said on the other end

Home? Amy thought, anger starting to creep in. She knew he made that comment to sting. As if Amy wasn't part of John's 'home' anymore. She decided to ignore it, though now all nervousness has gone and, she couldn't help keep the irritation out of her voice.

"_Well he's pretty comfortable here, and we've missed spending a lot of time together…"_

It was a good thing they weren't having this conversation face to face, because Ricky had just rolled his eyes on the other end, looking as equally annoyed about this conversation they were having. Typical Amy, it's like she wants everyone to drop everything they were doing to suit her needs. He was John's father, not his sitter when Amy wasn't around. She can't just take John as she please out of his home and then bring him back whenever it was convenient for her.

_"Yeah Amy, I get it, but he's still has to come home sometime_"

There he goes again… Amy thought

"_Right, but he also deserves some time with his mother_" Amy said, now with a clear air of attitude.

_"He's been there for more than a week", _Ricky now too suddenly becoming irritated at the conversation, and at Amy.

_"I'm not asking for the world here Ricky"_

_"Okay so when then is it convenient for you? Look, you need to realize that this isn't just about you, he has his routine here. Adrian and I have our lives…the world doesn't revolve around your own needs Amy. Not everything can be what you want all the time"_ Ricky said, almost shouting. The conversation now starting to become more and more heated.

Ricky remembered then why they started communicating through George in the first place. They just couldn't stand each other anymore.

_"OMG Ricky I've never said anything like that, don't start putting words…" _tears filling her eyes from all the frustration and anger this conversation has led them too.

_"This isn't going anywhere"_ Ricky said cutting Amy off _"lets just say have him back home by Friday"_

_"Fine" _Amy said her voice flat. 

_"Okay let me talk to him"_

"_He's sleeping, I'll let him call you when he wakes up_".

Amy hung up before he could reply.


	5. Chapter 5

Ricky had just gotten home from a long day at work. Adrian still wasn't home. Thank god it was finally the weekend, he thought, and he was finally going to see John after 2 long weeks. The longest he has gone without seeing him, even counting the early years of John's life, when he was still figuring out how to be a father at hears the doorbell ring and a smile creeps up on his face knowing exactly who it rushes down stairs and goes straight to the front door. His smiling face must have turned into that "deer in a headlights" look.

"_Amy…_" Ricky said a little stunned. He was expecting George and instead saw Amy. And she looked…different. Her hair was shorter, and wavy. Instead of the long straight hair he was used to seeing, it now rested just above her shoulders. What didn't change though were those familiar bangs swept to the side, in the typical Amy Jeurgens fashion. And her eyes, just as big and brown as ever. The exact same pair he remembered being memorized by all those years ago. She looked a little more grown up now, and New York definitely had an influence on her style. Ricky couldn't help feeling a little intimidated at first. She looked so…sophisticated.

Amy, also taken a back at this awkward reunion, didn't know what to say. Finally she spoke, "_so um just here to drop John off_"

"Sorry" Ricky finally said, when he finally recovered_ "I was just expecting George"_

This comment irritated Amy for some reason.

_"My dad is at the restaurant. And I'm obviously more than capable dropping off my son at his father's house…just because I haven't been the one doing it the past few years" _Amy said, snapping her response.

And just like that they were both back to their old ways. She might look a little different but she was still the exact same Amy who could really annoy him to no end.

_"No, I know that Amy"_ Ricky said also starting to get frustrated. He swept a hand over his hair, and scratched the back of his head. A sign of annoyance. "_I've just been used to seeing George drop him off, so mentally, I was a little surprised. Every comment I make is not to try and offend you"._

God, can't they have one conversation without ripping each others head off? They haven't spoken to in months, or probably even over a year and 30 seconds in they were starting to argue, Ricky thought.

Amy ignored him and instead knelt down to the 7 year old still holding her hand, who was also just as confused about what to feel as the two grown-ups with him.

_"Bye sweetheart, I'll see you soon ok"_ Amy said looking at John as she pulled him into a tight hug.

_"Tomorrow?"_ John asked innocently. Amy pulled back but kept both hands rested on top of John's shoulders.

_"No, I don't know, but very soon"_ Amy said smiling

_"Are you going back on the plane?"_ John said now even more confused. He thought that once his mother was back home from big school, she would be back with him every day, just like he remembered when he was smaller.

_"No sweetheart"_ Amy said still smiling _"I told you I'm not leaving here anymore remember? Mommy's done big school so I'm here with you always now"_ Amy took one hand off John's shoulders and reached up to brush hair off John's face with her fingers to reassure him.

_"Why can't you come over tomorrow?"_ John asked innocently, not understanding why her mother just can't spend time with them at their house now that she was back. He was also wondering why his dad never came over to grandpas to visit like he usually did when he was over there.

"_Well….." _Amy stalled, trying to choose her words carefully. "_You're dad misses you, and we got to spend so much mommy and John time already, now it's daddy's turn to spend some time with you, maybe doing lots of boy stuff_" Amy said winking and making a face at 'boy stuff' to bring light of the situation. She wasn't really sure of the appropriate response to John's very valid questions.

_"But Adrian is here too and she's not a boy. Also my teacher said there's no such thing as boy or girl stuff. One time, Jacob said that pink was a girl colour and Ms. Attens said that a colour is a colour…" _John was going to go on about stories from his grade 1 class, as little boys usually do but Ricky cut him off. 

_"Alright buddy, come inside and let's get some ice cream" _Ricky said, trying to change the conversation. _"Amy why don't you come in too" _Ricky offered to hopefully distract John from his line of questioning

Amy understood right away what Ricky was trying to do and went along.

_"Ice cream sounds amazing!"_ Amy said in an over the top excited tone that came out sounding so fake that anyone other than a 7 year old would have understood as sarcasm.


	6. Chapter 6

_"So what else happened?"_ Adrian inquired, cuddled next to Ricky on the couch while the two watched the late night shows on TV. John was sound asleep in his room.

"_I told you, she had some ice cream with John and I. John talked the whole time. Amy and I barely said anything to each other. She was here probably not even 30 minutes. Believe me, she was just as uncomfortable as I was to have been sitting in our kitchen eating ice cream"._

_"Okay"_ Adrian said stretching her neck and lifting her face to kiss Ricky. Their kiss started to get a little heated and Ricky gently pushed Adrian down so she was on her back lying on the couch, with Ricky right on top of her.

After a few moments, Ricky pulled away, slightly getting up and resting his weight on his left elbow. _"You know I kinda like when you're jealous"_ Ricky said smiling

_"I am not jealous"_ Adrian said frowning

_"Its kinda hot_" Ricky said continuing to tease Adrian.

"_OMG Ricky I am not Jealous of Amy Jeurgens. Please_." Adrian said, rolling her eyes.

_"okay okay, just saying"_ Ricky said smiling, before pulling Adrian back in for another kiss.

_"So what do you think!"_ Amy asked leading Ben into an empty apartment, her arms out wide as she stepped into the middle of what was…the living room? dining room? room where people got slaughtered?

"OH MY GROSS!" Ben exclaimed as he stepped into a room that, in his opinion should have been burnt and probably the reason diseases like ebola existed.

_"Okay, it's a little messy and needs some fresh paint"_

_"A little? And really? __**SOME**__ fresh paint?_ Ben said raising an eye brow, extenuating the word 'some'. He was more than appalled "_Also I don't think 'messy' is the appropriate adjective you're looking for…disease infested would probably be more suitable" _The floor boards squeaked as he walk around to examine the place, each area even more grotesque in his opinion than the previous.

_"Its what I can afford. Forget how it looks right now, look at the space! It's like triple the size of my apartment in New York. Look at this neighbourhood!"_ Amy said looking out a large floor to ceiling window. It would have looked nice if there wasn't a massive piece of plastic, duck taped in the middle of the window to cover a large hole. The frame was rusting and the paint was so chipped it cracked and crumbled on the floor the second anything touched it.

The view though, Ben had to admit was pretty amazing, it looked out into a large field, the duck pond visible on the left side. Picnic benches perched under giant trees. Ben knew the place well, as he, Alice and Henry spent a lot of their high school nights hanging out in that very park. But who knew this dump existed so close to their little known paradise. Perhaps though, it wasn't such a dump then. Regardless, it was now, and he had to save Amy from acquiring such a place.

_"Amy my god, please let my dad help you get a place" _

_"Ben I can't just rely on Leo my whole life! Its time I do something on my own"_

_"Have your parents seen this place?" _

_"My dad, and he refuses to talk about it. But I don't care, I signed the lease! Its miiiiineee_!" Amy said almost squealing.

"Amy…" Ben said sighing

"_Ben! I can't believe you're not more excited for me. Two bedrooms! And….look at this_" Amy said leading Ben into a little nook "_my office! I can use this place to write and it looks out right into the park! How can you not see this place is perfect for me and John!"_

_"Because this place is gross Amy that's why. And just because you're saving money on rent, imagine how much money you need to just fix up this place"_

_"I have some saved up and my parents gave me a nice cheque as a graduation present. I'm going to need some help though" _Amy said, turning to Ben

Ben rolled his eyes. _"Again with that word 'some', I'm starting to think you don't know what it means. Honestly Amy, I really don't think you know what you're getting into"_

_"No Ben, I don't think YOU realize what I'm getting myself into" _Amy said putting a positive spin on Ben's little comment, her smile wide, almost giddy with excitement, "_and I for one think it's going to be amazing when it finally comes together"_

_"Yeah, YOU for one and ONE alone"_ Ben said.


	7. Chapter 7

Amy was talking with Alice and Henry in a small crowd filled with some of their friends from university. They were celebrating their engagement. Amy listened as Alice and Henry told stories about their engagement and answered questions about their up-coming wedding. A few minutes later Ben joined the group, and Amy and Ben started having their own mini discussion away from the rest of the crowd.

_"So I guess you must be loving your new place?"_ Ben said to Amy. The summer was almost over and Ben had finally officially moved back from New York. He was going to start working with his Dad, and hopefully learn all he needed to know to take over the business one day.

_"You know, I don't want to say I told you so…but I told you so!"_ Amy said beaming

Amy and her parents, along with whoever they can hussle for help has been working on fixing up Amy's apartment all summer. Ben had also helped out whenever he was down for a visit. Henry and Alice even did their fair share of hard labour, despite Amy's protest that the couple should be focusing on their wedding planning instead of wasting their summer fixing up her place. It was Alice however who insisted that she would rather be fixing up an old place than spend her time picking over paper finishes for the invites or examining 20 different types of lace linens when they all looked the same to her. Leo had also insisted on sending some handy people he knew to help out, even though Amy told him it was really not necessary. Despite Amy insisting that she already had enough help, 3 workers had shown up at her place the second week they started working on the apartment. When she asked how much the extra help was going to cost her, Leo refused to talk to her about it. In the end she was more than glad for their help. When Amy first acquired the place, she figured she just needed to give everything a good scrub, put a fresh coat of paint on all the walls and fix some minor cosmetic things, like replacing the broken window and sanding down the frames before repainting again. However, the crew of three that Leo sent were able to see a lot of stuff she would have never guess to even think about, including some very necessary health and safety work that needed to be redone. One of them pulled out the window frame and found mold. So they had to evacuate the place for one whole day until a professional mold remover could go through the whole place and treat the whole apartment.

"_Uh Okay there 'miss I almost had a melt down' when they found mold all over the place_" Ben said, sarcastically "_If anyone should be saying 'I told you so' it should be me_"

Amy sighed "_Alright you win. I can't thank your dad enough for sending his guys to help. I honestly don't know what I would have done. I'm going to have a home warming soon, make sure you save the date_"

_"Wouldn't miss it. Can't wait to see the final deal"_

Just then from the corner of her eye she noticed Ricky and Adrian walking in. Ben followed Amy's gaze and instantly understood the look on Amy's face.

_"You alright?"_ Ben asked

Amy forced herself to look away and find something else to focus on _"Of course, why wouldn't I be?"_ Amy said trying to sound as nonchalant as possible, despite the knot that began forming in her stomach.

_"Oh I don't know…perhaps a certain.."_ Amy cut him off to turn the focus away from her.

"_Maybe I should be asking you that"_

Ben looked perplexed. _"And why is that Amy?"_

"_Well you did take the break up with Adrian pretty hard_"

"_Four years ago! And I'm way over it"_ Ben said as he chugged the rest of his Champaign down. "_Although, I think I'm going to need another of these, care to join?" _

For the rest of the evening Amy had managed to avoid Ricky and Adrian. Likewise, Ricky and Adrian seemed to be trying to do the same. Ricky was doing everything he could to avoid the awkwardness of simply being with Adrian in front of Amy. Adrian on the other hand just didn't care for Amy and didn't want Ricky to be talking to her, if she could help it. She wanted Amy to stay as far away from Ricky and she wanted Ricky to do the same. Ben on the other hand, true to his word, proved that he no longer cared about the Ricky and Adrian relationship and chatted with them a few times throughout the evening.

Ricky pulled out his and Adrian's coat ticket to grab their coats. As he walked out of the main reception area and into the coat room, he saw a familiar brunet waiting by the counter. "_Oh shit"_ Ricky thought in his head. He had managed to avoid Amy all night, a few more minutes and he would be home free. He was about to turn around, hopefully un-noticed when Amy turned and saw him just as he was about to head back in. "_Damn_" he thought. There was no choice but to go and get their coat, because anything else with be too obvious. Though Ricky couldn't help notice how great Amy was looking that night, with her hair, short and wavy just resting above her shoulders. She was wearing a nice form fitting black dress that looked like it was tailored just for her. "_Stop it_" he thought. You hate that girl. His thoughts continue to wonder. Still just because you hated somebody doesn't mean one can't appreciate the way they looked.

_"Hey"_ Ricky said as he approached the counter, avoiding eye contact, waiting for the man in charge of the coat room to come back out.

_"Hey"_ Amy replied back, also not looking at Ricky, but instead staring straight ahead hoping the man would soon return with her coat.

Ricky drummed his fingers on the counter. He was about to say something to fill the awkward silence, when Amy spoke.

_"John at your parents?"_

_"No actually Nora is watching him"_

The two spoke but continued to avoid looking at each other.

"Oh…_So, I've actually been wanting to discuss something with you"_

Ricky knew exactly what Amy wanted to talk to him about and this was exactly the discussion he was dreading on having.

Amy continued _"I've been back a few months now and my apartment is finally all fixed up, so I was thinking if we can talk about who would get John when"_

_"Of course, but keep in mind Amy we don't want to change his routine too drastically. This has been his life for the past three years and we don't want to do anything that might set him off"_

For some reason that comment irritated Amy. All she's asked for was a meeting. Already he was assuming the worst, making it sound so negative. She wasn't a selfless idiot. And why would an arranging for John to spend an equal amount of time with her 'set him off?' But regardless of how innocent his comment may be, it didn't take much for Ricky to irritate her. She didn't know what it was about him. It could be the simplest thing, or the simplest comment and she would get annoyed. Her patience was short whenever it came to dealing with Ricky. Thank god they never got married. If there was any doubt back then whether she made the right decision about cancelling the wedding, there was certainly none now. I mean how could they spend the rest of their lives together when they couldn't even spend 5 minutes? The man came back with her coat then. Although it seemed that she has been waiting there for what seemed like the longest time, it had actually just been mere minutes. Amy took her coat at the same time Ricky handed his tickets to the gentlemen.

_"Okay so do you know when you would be available to talk?"_ Amy asked

Ricky sensed the Amy was annoyed with him. What was up with her? And what the hell did he do that would make her already so frustrated with him? He said like one thing to her in the past 2 minutes he's been standing there. Ricky sighed, he was about to say something sarcastic but when he turned to finally look at Amy he could tell something was wrong. Her forehead was creased into a frown which meant she was thinking about something. That 'world on your shoulders' look, he had called it all those years ago, when she was worried about something but wouldn't tell anyone that anything was bothering her. This was enough to make Ricky ease off, so instead he replied:

_"I'll have to check my schedule, but I'll get back to you"_

"Great" An awkward pause, then Amy said, "Well, tell John I said goodnight I guess", then turned around to leave.


	8. Chapter 8

Ricky put his phone down, clearly frustrated. He had tried texting Amy to try and confirm their meeting for tomorrow. She had called him two days after they awkwardly bumped into each other at Henry and Alice's engagement party.

She had asked if she could pick up John to spend a few hours with him, since she was free all of that day. Since Amy has spent most of her summer working on her apartment, John stayed mostly with him and Adrian, except for weekends and a few weeknights here or there whenever Amy felt like taking a break from the hard labour. He hesitated at first telling her that they had already paid for him to spend two weeks at a soccer summer camp. The meeting hasn't been brought up since the night of Alice and Henry's party. She then offered to pick him up from camp, and promised to take him home shortly after dinner time. Ricky couldn't argue with that. Letting Amy pick up John was one less responsibility he had to worry about, and John was going to get to spend time with his mom. It was really a win, win.

After Amy had dropped him off that night, she called him a few hours later asking him if he was still willing to meet up to discuss who was going to get John when.

"_We can go through it formally through a mediator if you feel more comfortable with that, or we can try and discuss it on our own, between the two of us_", she had said over the phone.

Ricky knew he couldn't avoid this. Maybe it won't be as bad as he thinks, but if Amy thinks she's going to get full custody of John again, he would certainly fight it every way. He also thought they should at least meet up first, and try to settle it between the two of them and see how things went from there. She agreed and they settled on a time for the next day.

The next day however, he had called her to say that he had just left the office and was on his way to meet her at the coffee shop but the call went straight to voicemail. Five minutes later she texted back telling him that she was '_sorry, but something important came up and won't be able to make it for tonight'_. He remembered being frustrated. She couldn't call him to let him know that? Or at the very least, pick up the phone when he had called her? And what was more important than John? She was the one who insisted they get the arrangement sorted out before he started school again. Instead she replied by sending him a vague text, not even offering up an excuse for not being to make their meeting. He was so mad he didn't even bother replying to text. Instead went straight home and vented to Adrian, who just sat and listened and looked equally annoyed for both him and John. "_First she takes off for four years, expecting you to raise your son together on your own, in her absence and now she can't even make it to a meeting? Unbelievable_" Adrian had said, as she rolled her eyes just at the thought of Amy Jeurgens. She had been here a few months, and frankly she was already sick of having to deal with her all the time.

Now here he was a week later, trying to get a hold of Amy to see if they were still on for their rescheduled time. Suddenly he heard his phone beep, indicating that he had just received a message. 'Finally' he thought, as he hastily picked it up. To his disappointment however, it wasn't Amy but a colleague from work, to give him some details about a completely different kind of meeting tomorrow, which had something to do with a big project his team was working on. He was already stressed enough about that and this thing with Amy wasn't exactly what he needed right now.

The next day he still hasn't heard from Amy. Against his better judgement, he decided to see if he could find out some information on George. Or at the very least, see if maybe George could get her to at least contact him. This situation was starting to stress him out and he just wanted to get over it. He thought about just ignoring it. After all, unofficially he already had custody of John. It was Amy that should be reaching out to him, not the other way around. But he knew Amy and he knew better. If it didn't get resolved now, they would have to deal with it again later, and later would probably mean things could get messier and out of hand. It's best to nip this in the butt before it gets to a place neither he nor Amy (so he would hope) got to. Amy had taken him to court before, and lost. But he couldn't take the chance again of having to go through the courts and having them decide what was best for their son. As far as Ricky was concerned, in most cases, it was the parents who should decide and not the law. He didn't want the courts to tell him when he should have his son and when, and while it seems he didn't know Amy anymore, surely she wouldn't want that as well.

Ricky walked out of his office building towards his car. He pulled out his cell phone to call George. It went to voicemail. He was probably at the restaurant. He checked the time. It was still early so hopefully they were in between the lunch and dinner rush and he wouldn't be bothering George at a busy time.

_"Geoff's Restaurant"_ A perky young female voice answered on the other end.

_"Hi, I'm just wondering if George, the owner is there"_

_"Hold please" _

Ricky waited a few minutes.

_"George speaking" _

"_Hey George, it's Ricky. I'm sorry to bother you but I was just wondering if you could pass on a message to Amy from me. We were supposed to meet up last week to talk about arrangements for John but she cancelled and now I can't seem to get a hold of her_"

_"Really? That's weird_" George started "_I haven't seen her since last week either. She's moved into her new place a few weeks ago and I figured she must have been pretty busy. Also to be honest I've been at the restaurant almost 24 hours, It's getting busier now that people are trying to take advantage of the last remaining patio season_"

Ricky suddenly felt bad for having dragged George into this mess with Amy. Of course he was busy at the restaurant. He knew this. They were always busy in the summer and busier now, like he said that people were trying to make the most of the tail end of the summer months.

"_Ok, thanks George. Really sorry to bother you at work. I shouldn't have bothered you with this"_

_"Listen it's no problem. I find it a little strange though. I know Amy is not always the easiest to get along with sometimes, but I don't know when it comes to John, she's pretty on top of things"_ George said

It was true. Amy was a type A personality, and If there was only one thing Amy could be anal about it would be about John. Whatever reason Amy had must be really important. Maybe she was interviewing for new jobs? Still that didn't explain the way she just blew him off, interviews didn't exactly last the whole day, or the fact that even George haven't heard for her for a whole full week. Maybe she had decided to consult a lawyer after all, and was waiting until she had all the information she needed to lay it all out to him unexpected. That was something he wouldn't put past Amy on doing.

"_Yeah, you're right George. Well thanks again for your time and again so sorry to bother you when you're already so busy" _Ricky said, a little too formally. But he really did feel bad about bothering him.

"_Why don't you just go over to her place and sort this whole thing out. That way you can also let me know if she's still alive_" George said jokingly on the phone

Ricky found a notepad and pen in his glove compartment and wrote down the address George gave him to Amy's new place, and then thanked George one last time for his help; wincing as he did so as even he realized the amount of time's he has said sorry and thank you in their 5 minute conversation was probably overkill.


	9. Chapter 9

As soon as George gave him the address, Ricky knew right away where to find the apartment. He could even visualize which building it was. 'Might as well get this over with' he thought, and drove straight to Amy's new place.

10 minutes later, he was pulling up in front of a white low rise building.

He grabbed the piece of paper where he had scribbled down the address - _Apartment #39, third floor_.

Ricky got out of the car and walked up to the front door of the building, just as someone was coming out with their dog. Instead of letting himself in, he decided to buzz Amy's apartment from downstairs. That way she was at least expecting him somewhat, instead of just showing up right at her door. Ricky found Amy's name on the list and punched in the number on the intercom. He waited a few minutes – no answer. He tried once more, waiting a little while longer for an answer and when none came he decided it was time to call it a day and turned around to leave.

'Well it was worth a shot, she can't accuse him of not trying - that was certain. Next time she wants to meet its going to have to be under his terms'. In his mind, he was done chasing Amy.

He was just about to get back into his car to drive away when he spotted what looked like Amy's car. It was sitting at the parking lot on the east side of the building. 'Okay what the hell he thought', she must be home if her car is here. Curiosity got the better of him. He closed his car door and started to walk towards the parking lot to check if it was, in fact, Amy's car. Out of the corner of his eye he saw another resident coming out of the building_. _He decided this time to make his way up to her apartment.

_"Hold the door"_ he called out to the man.

The man, an older gentleman, held the door open and waited for him to approach. He was walking with a cane and had one of those sheriff styled hat you see in the movies.

"_Thanks, I'm just visiting a friend of mine, she moved in a couple weeks ago_" Ricky said as he approached the door. He felt the need to explain himself to give the man some sense of security that he wasn't some crazy, trying to sneak into the building.

_ "Ah, sweet girl from New York?" _

_"That would be the one"_ Ricky replied back and then thought quietly in his head, 'though I don't know about sweet, or New York. Spending four years there hardly made one a New Yorker. Is that what Amy has been telling people now a days? Unbelievable'.

"_Alright, well have a nice day_" The man said, tipping his hat before walking away.

_"You too and thanks again"_ Ricky called out as he walked through the building doors. He took the stairs to the third floor and found the apartment he was looking for. 'Well this has gotta be the one' he thought as he knocked. No answer. He heard someone moving inside. 'Okay honestly what the hell is going on? Is she really that immature to just be hiding out from him like this?'

He didn't know what made him try checking to see if the door was unlocked. He knew enough to just leave people alone when they were blatantly ignoring you. But, against all instinct, he tried turning the knob and it twisted allowing him to open the door.

He stepped in and instantly knew the place was Amy's, just from the setup and some old furniture he recognized from Anne's old house. He heard more movement coming from somewhere inside. A sense of fear and awkwardness came over him, 'Oh god was she with someone?'

Any other time Ricky would have turned around before he was noticed, and he was about to do just that when he noticed a pair of shoes left by the door. Which clearly belonged to a female, and there wasn't any other sign of a second person being here.

After a moment, from where he was standing, Ricky called out "Amy?"


	10. Chapter 10

Amy stood bent over the sink in her new bathroom gripping the side of the counter. She was trying to will the dizziness that has been hitting her for what seemed like the last hour. She took a deep breath until her head felt clear again and very carefully turned the water on to splash some water on her face. She moved in small and careful movements and kept her head steady as to not bring on another wave of dizziness. The cold water made her feel somewhat better, but before she knew it another wave of vertigo hit her, making the world spin around her. She tried to hold on to the wall to steady herself, but found herself on the floor of her washroom, her back against the wall trying to make it stop moving. She closed her eyes, her fist clenched tight to her sides as she waited for it to pass yet again. After a few minutes it had finally stopped. Afraid to move as she didn't want to risk another dizzy spell, she stayed put, sitting on the ground, her back firmly against the wall. Suddenly she felt sick. Oh no. she thought, she tried pushing herself forward to crawl to the toilet but she had no control of her body anymore and suddenly threw up all over her tiled bathroom floor.

It was then she heard a voice. Or maybe she was just imagining it. Then she heard it again. No, Someone was definitely calling her name. It was a deep male voice. "Dad?" She called out, her voice horse and weak, she wasn't expecting him, but hoping her dad was here out of pure luck. Please, let it not be just her imagination. She heard someone walking closer. Thank god, her dad couldn't have come at a better time.

_"Amy!?" _She looked up finally recognizing the voice. It wasn't her dad – but at least it was someone.

"_Ricky…"_ she started her voice barely a whisper at this point, "_you need to call my dad_" She managed to choke out before she threw up again.

Ricky felt like he was impaled for a second. He was standing by the bathroom door. The first thing he saw was Amy on the ground throwing up. It wasn't the throwing up part that concerned him – he'd seen enough of that being a dad for the past 7 years – Ricky's had his fair share of staying up at night with a sick child. It was the image of Amy that caused him to feel fear. Her face was completely pale, she was sweating, dark circles surrounded her eyes, her body looked limp, like she was using all the energy she had to hold herself up – which she probably was by the looks of it.

"_Amy_?!" he said finally finding his voice.

_"You need to call my dad_" She said, her voice strained. She felt a little embarrassed about Ricky finding her like this. But as she felt her body rebel against her, her gut reacting to the on and off dizzy spells that has crippled her for the past hour, she also felt somewhat relieved that someone was here to help. Though he definitely wouldn't have been her first choice to be the one who found her like this.

Finally, it was like Ricky came to, panic subsided and he moved towards Amy to try and help her.

"_I think I need to get you to the hospital first_" Ricky said as he crouched down beside Amy, but not touching her.

Suddenly Amy seemed to panic, she turned her head to look past Ricky _"Wait…is John with you? I can't let him see me like…"_

"_No John's not here. I came straight from work, George gave me the address_" Ricky said automatically. Amy moved to try and get up and Ricky put himself in front of her, holding the sides of her arms helping her off the floor. He led her to the living room and eased her down on the couch. His hand brushed against her skin as he helped lay her down.

_"Jesus Amy, you're burning". _

Amy closed her eyes, the dizziness gone, but now she just felt weak. Her body began to shiver as she tried to wrap the long cardigan she was wearing closer around her body.

"_Can you call my dad and tell him to come here_" Amy said her eyes still closed. _"…actually call my mom...tell my mom to come" _

_"I think we need to get you to the hospital Amy_" He noticed Amy had started shivering, not seeing a blanket anywhere in the immediate surroundings, he took off his sports coat and put it over her as a temporary solution _"I can call your parents on the way"._

_"No…no hospital…my mom"_ Amy said. She was exhausted, and she didn't want to make this a big deal for everyone by going to the hospital. Fighting the waves of nausea was making her so tired. Besides, she already knew enough about hospitals to understand that it would be a complete useless waste of time, for everyone. She would spend many seemingly uncomfortable hours there, wearing a god damn paper dress, then after feeling ridiculously violated, being poked and prodded, with no results to show for - they would just send her home with a wack of prescriptions. 'No freakin' way', she thought.

Then suddenly the room began to spin again. _"Oh shit"_, Amy mumbled as another hit of dizziness went through her. The room again, felt like it was spinning. Moaning, she gripped the edge of the couch with one hand and her forehead with the other.

_"Amy what's happening?"_ Concerned, Ricky knelt down on the couch beside her. Intently staring at her, but again, not touching her.

Finally, after a few minutes, Amy said, "_In my bag. There's an appointment card, for my doctors office_"

Ricky quickly rushed over to the black bag that was left on the floor by front door and frantically went through it until he saw a small white card. He read the contact info on top "Dr. Jane Simone, MD. Neurologist". He didn't even have time to wonder why Amy would have an appointment with a neurologist. He pulled his phone out of his pocket and dialed the number underneath.

As he listened to the rings waiting for someone to pick up, he noticed 3 lines of dates and time scribbled on the card. He recognized the first one right away. It was on the same day she texted him saying she couldn't meet up, the last appointment was from this morning. What the hell was going on? And what was he suppose to say to this Neurologist? Hi do you know Amy? She just vomited and now she's having some sort of fever shakes…please advice?

A voice cut off his train of thought

_"Doctors Office"_

"_Hi I have an emergency regarding one of Dr. Simone's patient - Amy Jeurgens_" Ricky started, words just spilling out of him in one single breath. After telling the receptionist about Amy's symptoms, he waited another 15 minutes for the doctor to come on the line. As he waited he found a blanket in Amy's room, along with a pillow. He wrapped Amy inside the blanket, and now she was lying on the couch with her eyes closed looking like a burrito. Her head, the only part of her body not wrapped in the blanket, rested on the pillow. He was seriously considering just hanging up and taking her to the hospital when finally Dr. Simone picked up the line. After what was like a 5 minute discussion, if that, where he just repeated everything he told the receptionist, answering a few questions here and there, something about getting her to take her medication; Dr. Simone suggested he take her to the emergency room immediately.

Exactly what I was thinking 30 minutes ago, Ricky thought.


	11. Chapter 11

Ricky called George on the way to the hospital and George got a hold of Anne. Ricky stayed at the hospital only until George showed up to fill him in on what had happened once he got to Amy's place. He left shortly after Anne arrived, only because he didn't want to leave George alone after telling him what had happened at the apartment.

Now Anne and George were the only two at the hospital trying to comprehend everything they had just come to know about their daughter's health. A specialist came out to talk to them about Amy's supposed health condition.

"_She was referred to me by a doctor in New York_" Dr. Simone began after she had introduced herself "_She had a serious episode of vertigo about a year ago and continues to have them on and off. I have seen her on a number of occasions for the past 2 months; she's had a few testing done both here and New York. She's also had several brain scans, but nothing unusual has shown up. We have a number of theories on what it could be, but so far all the tests have come out inconclusive_." The doctor paused and was about to turn and walk back through the examination area, but before she did, she added "_I'm sorry to spring this all on you. I didn't realize she hasn't told anybody so I can understand that this must be hard_."

Now almost an hour after they heard the news, George and Anne waited outside while Amy was administered in the hospital, going through some testing. The doctor had told them they would be able to see her as soon as they were done with the testing, but because the tests were sensitive, Amy preferred not to have anyone in the room. Anne couldn't phantom why Amy wouldn't want her there. Actually she felt a little hurt.

_"She's never said anything to you?"_ Anne asked, after they had received the news.

_"Nothing, I had no idea any of this was going on"_ George replied

After that Anne sat quietly trying to understand what was going on with her eldest daughter. How was it that her daughter had been going through something so serious without her knowing a thing about it? And brain scans? I mean those aren't things you kept from your family. Certainly not from you own mother? Anne felt a pang of guilt. She should have been there with Amy when she had been going through all those tests. Maybe there were signs she didn't noticed. Perhaps if she's been around Amy more, she would have known something was going on. Maybe she should have at least called and checked in more often. Whatever was happening, Anne was determined that from here on, they were going to get through it as a family.

On the other side of town, inside their small two story apartment, Ricky sat in the kitchen holding a cup of cold coffee, also wondering about Amy. He knew something was wrong that night at the party, but he assumed it was related to John. John was upstairs sleeping and he was pretty sure Adrian had already gone to bed. He didn't stick around at the hospital so he still had no idea what was going on. He hadn't heard from George or Anne either, but it wasn't like he was expecting to. As soon as he helped check Amy in, they strapped her on a wheel chair and wheeled her inside the emergency room. Because he wasn't family, he was not allowed to go with her. His thoughts led him to the car ride with Amy to the hospital.

"_Hang on Amy, we'll be in at the hospital in no time_" Ricky had said after climbing into the driver seat. Amy had protested about going to the hospital after Ricky had gotten off the phone. It only took a few minutes for Ricky to win the conversation, since Amy wasn't exactly in a position to win arguments at the moment.

Less than 10 minutes later he had finally gotten her in the car so they could make their way to the hospital. She was slouched against the passenger door, wearing a massive sweater and a scarf, despite the 20 degree weather outside; which he help her put on just before they left her apartment.

"_I still think this is going to be a waste of time…Its probably just the flu or something. I could just sleep it off_" Amy said, though her voice was wavering and it seemed like she was using all her strength to even speak.

Ricky looked at her with an incredulous look on his face, which Amy of course didn't see, as he shifted the car into gear.

"_The flu?! Really?"_

_"It's not like I'm dying"_

"_Well it sure as hell looks like it"_

Amy suddenly stiffened at Ricky's last response and Ricky immediately regretted saying it. An awkward silence filled the car. After a moment, he heard Amy sigh as she leaned her head back and closed her eyes. A few minutes later her breathing slowed to a steady rhythm which meant she had probably fallen asleep.

Ricky's thoughts were interrupted by two hands rubbing his shoulders. He lifted one hand off his coffee cup to take one of Adrian's and turned to kiss it.

"_You coming to bed?"_ Adrian asked as she bent down to kiss Ricky's temples

"_Yeah, in a minute – just thinking about what happened with Amy today_"

Adrian tried not to feel offended that her boyfriend was sitting in their kitchen late at night, thinking about another woman. The same one, who was also the mother of his child. But she decided that jealousy right now wasn't a good look, and chose the 'understanding girlfriend' route instead. She pulled a chair to sit next to him.

_"I'm sure whatever it is, she'll be fine"_

"_I don't know Adrian. You should have seen her."_ Ricky said rubbing his face, trying to make sense of everything he witnessed that afternoon.

He placed both his hands back around the coffee mug he had been holding. "_And when I was looking for that card in her bag, there were at least 3 prescription bottles in there. I don't know any 22 year old that have to take three different prescription medications and have nothing seriously wrong with them" _Ricky said sighing.

"_You're worried about her"_ Adrian said, more as a statement rather than a question.

"_No I….just…I don't know – Nothing about this makes sense. I mean you saw her at the engagement party right? She didn't look sick…but today…_" Ricky said, not really knowing the right response. He wasn't trying to hide anything from Adrian. He really didn't know what he was feeling. He was genuinely confused. It wasn't that he had feelings for Amy. He would be just as concerned if it was any of his friends he found like that. Except Amy was no longer his friend. They both threw their friendship away years ago the same time they threw away their relationship. The only thing really tying them together was the fact that they have a son together, and heck they couldn't even manage to be civil to each other because of it. They could barely manage to co-parent together.

_"Well I'm sure it can't be that bad, if she was trying to pass it off as the flu". _Ricky had told Adrian every detail of that afternoon.

Ricky scratched his head again trying to gain some clarity.

"_This whole thing – its just so weird" _Ricky said again_. _

Ricky went silent again, Adrian beside him also not saying anything. He was trying to make sense of everything in his head. He couldn't shake this feeling he had – Amy ignoring his text messages, going to her apartment to confront her about it. And why would she not just tell him about the appointment? Why would she try to hide that? His mind wondered back to the image of Amy in her bathroom. He felt his chest tighten just at the memory.

Then suddenly in a low voice he said, "_If I hadn't gone to her apartment – who knows what would have happened to her"_


	12. Chapter 12

Ricky had just strapped John into his booster seat and took out his cell phone to call Adrian. The phone rang just once before Adrian picked up.

_"Hey just picked up John from soccer camp. You sure you don't want to come to the hospital? We can pick you up on the way?" _

Ricky had heard from George earlier that morning. He had called to ask Ricky if he could pick up John for a few hours to see Amy. From their short conversation, he learned that he and Anne were still at the hospital, neither has left since last night. Ricky offered to bring John there, to save them the hassle. He had told Adrian that same morning and asked her to come with them but she gently turned him down.

Ricky decided to try again anyway, before heading to the hospital to see if she may have changed her mind.

_"It's okay Ricky. Just go without me. I have a lot of work to catch up on here anyway" _was her reply.

Amy laid at the hospital bed, starring out the window. She was finally able to relax after having to endure several tests at the hospital. Thankfully she had not had any more episodes since. They had her on some pretty strong medications, which made her feel worst than better. At least the dizziness had gone away. There was nothing worst than having to endure the uncontrollable spinning and not being able to do anything about it.

"Mommy?"

She turned her head and smiled. John cautiously walked into her hospital room but paused at the door with Ricky right behind him.

_"Hi baby! Come here!"_ She said pushing herself to sit up straighter on the bed and holding her arms out for John. As soon as he heard this he ran to his mother and climbed up on the bed.

_"John, careful_" Ricky said, in a warning tone.

He looked around the room and noticed balloons and a few bouquets of flowers, along with a row of get well cards lined up against the window. It was obvious he and John hadn't been her first visitors. One massive flower arrangement over powered the 3 others in the room. Even without looking at the card he knew the big one was from Leo. And if he knew anything about their friends from high school it was most likely that the whole gang had shown up as soon as they heard about Amy being in the hospital.

His eyes paused on an IV stand beside Amy's bed. It was filled with fluids but noticed Amy was not hooked up to it. Though he also noticed the band aid covered cotton ball on her arm which indicated she was, at some point, hooked on an IV. He remembered Amy hated any sort of needles, which probably had a lot to do with why she didn't want to check into the hospital in the first place. He suddenly felt bad for being the one to bring her here and just leaving without even making sure she was alright.

Ricky then looked at Amy. Last time he saw her she was adamant that she didn't want John seeing her sick. He felt some kind of pressure to explain why he had brought him.

"_George said…"_ Ricky started.

Amy had cut him off and smiled as if reading his mind saying "_Its fine. I was the one who had asked my dad to get him. He told me you were bringing him over instead"_

_"Yeah I wanted to save him the trouble"_

"_Mommy what happened to you_" John asked cuddled next to his mom on the too narrow hospital bed.

_"I was a little bit sick, but the doctor made me feel all better"_

John noticed the cotton ball taped on Amy's arm. He knew all about those, from his doctor check ups were he sometime had to get a shot.

"You got a needle?"

After a short pause, Amy decided on the easiest route and replied,

_"Yeah just a little one"_

_"Where you scared?"_

Amy smiled.

_"I was at first, but then I thought about all those shots you've taken and I thought hmm well if my son could do it with no tears then I could too!"_ Although not exactly a lie, Amy had stiffened up every time they had to poke her with a needle. First it was to draw blood. Next it was to stick up the IV tube up her arm, which was uncomfortable as hell.

"_So every time I had to get a shot, I just closed my eyes and thought about you_" Amy said smiling as she gently tapped John's nose with her pointer finger.

John smiled, remembering all those times he needed to get a needle during his check up. "_Man oh man you didn't even flinch at all!_" His doctor would always say "_You are one of the bravest little boys I've ever been seen in my office_!" Then he would get to choose a small trinket out of a small treasure box.

_"Mommy?"_

_"Yes sweetheart…"_

_"I'm glad I was able to help you feel brave" _

Amy's eyes filled with tears. She had to take deep breaths or for sure she would have lost it in front of John. Luckily John had turned his attention to the movie playing on TV, his head and back resting against Amy's torso.

She leaned her head back against the bed frame, her left arm wrapped around John and said… "_More than you'll ever know" _

Ricky decided to duck out of the room at that moment to give them some privacy. He took the elevator down to the first floor and grabbed a coffee from the cafeteria. After snapping the lid on his hot coffee he felt he phone vibrate. A text from Adrian:

'**hey baby, just leaving work.** **see u soon the house? picking up dinner on the way – luv u'**

Ricky typed in a reply: **still at the hospital but will see u soon. love you too :)**

He headed back up to Amy's room. When he got back, Amy and John were engaged in some sort of tickle fight. George was in the room with them.

John was still on the bed with Amy, but now Amy was cradling him as though he was an infant.

"_You know the last time we were here together, you were just a teeeeeny tiny baby_" Amy said tickling John. John giggled, his limbs sprawling out of Amy's arms clearly too big to be cradled.

"_I'm not a baby anymore!"_ John said

"_Oh no way. Uh uh. You will ALWAYSSS be my baby. Always Always Always_" Amy said as she pulled John close to her and tightly hugged him against her chest. Amy rested her cheek on top of John's head and when John attempted to pull away from his smothering mother, Amy started kissing him repeatedly on the top of his head. Making John even more annoyed with his mother.

_"MOM STOOOP!"_ John whined, now annoyed, his voice muffled against Amy's body. He was ready to jump off the bed.

"Always Always Always" Amy said again, before finally letting John go. John immediately took the opportunity to crawl off the bed.

Ricky stood at the doorway. The sight of the two of them brought a smile to his face.

_"Yup I remember that day well_" He said, walking into the room and scooping up John, after his mother had freed him and cradling him in the same way Amy did. He was now also in a teasing mood.

This elicited a small protest from John, who was getting tired of the game his parents were playing.

"_DADD PUT ME DOWWNNNNNN_!" John said whining. Johns body curved into Ricky's arms, his feet dangled over one side, the other side held up John's head at the crook of his elbow.

_"Yep I carried you JUST like this. Only you were much smaller then" _

"_Much much smaller"_ Amy said, "Honestly John, stop growing so fast!" a hint of regret in her voice. Her baby was growing up way too fast.

Finally, after a few moments, Ricky let go of John, freeing him from his minor misery.

"_Alright buddy we have to get going."_ He said as he put John down.

"_Aww, can I stay with Mommy and Grandpa_?"

"_You haven't had dinner?"_ Ricky said rubbing John's head.

"_I can take him to the restaurant"_ George said. "_I'm just waiting for Anne to get back. She just went home to take a shower, so she should be back soon_"

"_Please daddy? I want to have burgers at the restaurant"_ John begged his father as he looked up at him.

"_I'll bring him home before I come back here"_ George assured Ricky.

"_Alright, why not? I'll see you soon okay"_ Ricky said giving John a big hug.

_"Take care Amy"_ He said just before he left.

_"Thanks Ricky". _


	13. Chapter 13

**Author's Message: I know this is a short chapter. Still working on the next one but I promise to post it tomorrow. Initially, I wasn't sure if I was going to continue writing this, but had gotten a few request to keep updating :) So thanks for your support and feedback as they motivate me to continue this story. **

It has been almost two weeks since Amy had been released from the hospital. George had insisted for her to stay with him and Kathleen for the next little while, which Amy fought him on until he finally gave up. Anne thought it was a good idea as well, but seeing how flustered this made Amy, she decided to drop the subject.

_"Dad, what's the point of spending money on this apartment if I'm not going to live in it?"_

_"Why not sublet it for a few more months, until you're 100 percent certain you're better"_

This was exactly the kind of conversation Amy had wanted to avoid. She had imagined the same kind of arguments they would have if they knew about the episodes she had in New York.

_"Maybe we should go up there for a few weeks"_ She can hear her father say.

She would insist that it was not necessary; they would argue about it and in the end her father would pretend to let her win, whilst still finding excuses to check up on her, which would have no doubt annoyed her to no end. And she didn't need the kind of stress during her last year college, especially when she had her final thesis to think about. Being a college senior was hard enough without annoying, smothering parents.

This was exactly what was happening now. Exactly what she thought would happen. Right after Amy was released from the hospital, her mother took a few days off work to stay with her. That she didn't mind.

What irritated her now were the obscene amount of phone calls and text messages she got during the day. The number of calls increased the longer she took to respond. She made the mistake once of ignoring her mom's call and 30 minutes later she was at her door, with some lame excuse that she 'thought she forgot something she needed for work, last time she came to see Amy'.

George was just as bad, 'dropping by' to bring some left-overs from the restaurant, or a bag of groceries he figured she needed.

Even Ashley, who rarely stays in contact with her family since moving to Italy, had phoned her one night, which took her completely by surprise.

_"So I heard you almost died?"_ she said after Amy had picked up the call.

What Amy did cherish however, where the days she spent with John. At least he didn't look at her any differently. In fact he looked at her with even more wonder and awe. Apparently spending a few nights at the hospital and getting big needles made you a super hero to a 7 year old.

Even Ricky was acting a little nicer around her. Over the past few weeks, they have sort of figured out a tentative schedule for John. School had started last week, so their schedule had to change again. She thought back to a conversation they had last week, just as school was starting. Amy had John during the weekend and was supposed to drop him off Sunday night. Then she was going to meet them at school, so they can both see him off on his first day. However, she and John were having so much fun baking she decided to call Ricky and ask if it would be alright with him and John stayed an extra night – she could be the one to drop him off to school.

He expected Ricky to give her a hard time, but instead of the lecture she was expecting to get about honoring 'the schedule'; he just said '_Sure Amy, that works, I'll meet you both at the school in the morning. Give John a kiss for me'._

And that was the end of that.

Again she didn't know whether to take it as good thing. She knew damn well the only reason he was being so easy on her was because of what happened. What made it worst was that he was the one who had to find her in that state. She felt her cheek warm as she thought about how the whole situation must have looked to him; finding her on the floor of her bathroom, puking her guts out. She was pretty sure he was the one to clean up the mess she left in the bathroom too. The whole thing still embarrassed her. Heck, everything about this was embarrassing to her – like the way people were treating her right now.

And she hated it. More than anything she hated how her friends and family were treating her. As if she was a dying patient. She hated the fact that they were going out of their way to be 'nice' to her because she was 'sick'. She hated how fake it made everyone seem around her. She hated feeling like she couldn't do anything on her own without needing to be 'supervised'.

She hated it, because it made her think that they were right.


	14. Chapter 14

Amy finally finished the article she had been working on that day. Throughout the summer months she was able to get a job for a web based media company that operated several online magazine sites. The also managed a few well known online blogs. The pros was that the hours were flexible, which meant she could work whenever it fitted her schedule. The cons however were that you only got paid for each published piece you wrote. Luckily for Amy, they were interested in a several blog pieces regarding her DYI Home Reno project. This allowed her to get a steady income, while she got to write about her experience, along with the process of renovating her apartment.

She saved the latest file, vowing to edit it that night, and opened the web page that featured her DYI project. She took a few minutes to admire the before and after pictures she took of her apartment to go along with the articles she wrote.

She peeled her eyes off the screen to look around at the actual finish product. A feeling of pride washed over her, as she took in what she had accomplished, not only in the last couple of months but in the past few years. She had her degree, her own apartment, and was making some sort of living with her writing. Sure, it wasn't the kind of hard core 'journalism' she imagined herself doing once she got out of college. But everyone has their start somewhere. Right now, she was enjoying her quiet little life as it. She took a sip of the tea which was now cold and felt content.

She looked at the time. It was just after 10. Ricky was supposed to drop John off around dinner time, but called and asked if he could bring him by a bit later. Adrian was away apparently away on a business trip and he had been held up at work for a project that he's been working on for several months, so his parents were going to pick him up from school and they were going to have dinner there. Amy had offered to help and pick John up from school herself, but Ricky wanted to get the time with him, which she understood. He had called again just a few hours ago explaining that he would be later that he thought.

_"I'm sorry, we just finished dinner and John and my parents are playing some crazy game"_

She could hear laughter in the background and Amy felt a pang of envy as she sat alone in her quiet apartment.

"_That's okay, it sounds like he's having fun. Drop him off whenever he's ready to come here"_

_"Ok thanks Amy, I can bring him over tomorrow morning if you want, since it's a weekend anyway. I know it's getting pretty late"_

Amy thanked him but told him she would be up working anyway so he can drop him off at whatever time.

Finally at half past 10, Amy heard Ricky ringing from downstairs. A few minutes after she buzzed him up he showed up at her door carrying a sleeping 7 year old.

"_What did you guys do to him?"_ Amy joked, stepping aside to let them both in.

_"You should have seen how hyper he was earlier. Consider yourself lucky that you're getting him like this"_

She led Ricky and John into John's newly painted bedroom. Ricky set John down on the bed and Amy gently shook him awake

_"John, you need to brush your teeth"_ Amy whispered.

John stirred and whined sleepily then turned himself away from his mother to try and ignore her request.

"_Come on buddy, just a few minutes"_ Ricky said, gently pulling John up.

He guided a sleepy John into the bathroom to brush his teeth, while Amy went to John's dresser to pull out a set of PJs.

In the bathroom, Ricky grabbed the batman toothbrush, which he could only assume was Johns, spreading toothpaste on it. With his eyes half closed, John tipped his head back toward his dad who was still behind him, while Ricky cupped John's chin with one hand and brushed his teeth with the other. Clearly not the first time, he's tired out his son and had to help him get ready for bed.

Less than a minute later Amy walked in. _"Man you are sweaty!"_ Droplets of sweat gathered around John's forehead, the back of his neck also covered in sweat.

Amy grabbed a small face cloth and soaked it with warm water.

_"I told you, he was running around like crazy today. I'm surprise my dad was able to keep up. Alright time to spit buddy". _

John spat and rinsed and Amy washed his face with the warm wash cloth. Ricky helped her pull off John's sweater and jeans until he was down to his superhero underwear. Together they helped John get into his pajamas.

Ricky couldn't help but smile to himself. It's been so long since he felt some sort of partnership when it came to taking care of John. It felt nice to not have to do it alone for once, in a long time.

Adrian helped out a lot of course. But somehow it wasn't the same. She acted more like an aunt rather than a parent figure. This was one of the things he missed about parenting together with Amy.

Amy noticed the smile that formed on Ricky's face.

_"What's wrong with you?"_ Amy asked looking up at him, while she tried to guide John's left leg into his pajama pants.

_"What?"_

_"You're just standing there, smiling"_

_"Oh, I was just thinking about this day I guess" _

_"I'm starting to get a bit jealous about all this fun you boys had, maybe I shouldn't have allowed this extra time_" she teased.

Ricky shook his head, _"So, how have you been?"_

"_Good_" Was all she replied.

Ricky sensed Amy didn't want to talk about it. He still didn't understand why, but he dropped it.

Finally John was cleaned and dressed for bed. Ricky lifted him up and carried him back to his room. Amy lifted the covers off, so that Ricky could set him down. He was already asleep before he hit the bed. Ricky stood back so Amy could tuck him in. She sat on his bed beside him while she brushed his hair gently with her fingers and kissed him goodnight.

Ricky had made his way back into the living room and waited for Amy to walk out of John's room.

"_Sweet dreams sweetheart_" Amy whispered, giving John one final goodnight kiss. She turned off the lights and plugged in the night light, before walking out to find Ricky in the living room.

He was looking at the frames hanging on her wall.

"_Wow, these photographs are amazing_"

"_Oh. Those. Thanks_" Amy replied.

"Wait, What…You took these?" Ricky said turning to look at Amy.

"_They were part of my final thesis, I framed my favourites_"

Ricky finally noticed the byline on the two articles that were framed amongst the photograph, which had Amy's name on it.

The headlines on the articles too were very powerful, and Ricky was immediately intrigued.

**'The Right to Play, Looking at Children of the Third World' By Amy Jeurgens**.

'**Global Issues, the Biggest Threat to Child Mortality' By Amy Jeurgens**.

"_We had to choose a theme for a final thesis project. I chose inequality - focusing on children's rights. I always felt that journalist has the ability to change the world. I kept the rest in a scrapbook"_

_"There's more?"_ Ricky asked in awe.

Amy just smiled, and then rolled her eyes. _"It was a yearlong final thesis, Ricky. It was pretty intense" _She walked over to the coffee table and pulled out a thick album.

_"The rest are in here. We had to build a portfolio of all our work" _Ricky followed Amy and they both sat on the couch to look through the album, making sure there was a comfortable gap between them.

Ricky was speechless as he flipped through page after page of what work that obviously constituted a lot of talent. The photographs, though vibrant, were heartbreaking. It made him curious about the story behind it.

"_You took all these? How?"_ Ricky stared at the photographs of clearly malnourished children sitting in a place that looked almost in shambles and deserted.

"_I spent 3 weeks in Zambia for this project_" Amy then reached over and flipped the next couple of pages. Her arm brushed against Ricky's for a slight a second. He didn't noticed, but Amy adjusted her arm right away.

_"This project was focused on women in Guatemala. It was one of my most memorable pieces"_ Amy said in a soft voice, a memory she clearly treasured.

Amy was quiet for a moment while she fingered the corners of the pages, brushing the photograph over with her thumb. Ricky knew he'd lost her at that moment. She was no longer with him but somewhere in the past, far away from California. His eyes followed Amy's fingers as she brushed through different parts of the photographs. Trying to capture every moment back, as she recalled it in her memory.

After a moment, Amy finally spoke – trying to explain the pictures and how special they were.

"_All those people I met – man, they had nothing, but they were the kindest most generous souls I've ever met_"

Ricky's eyes scanned the photographs and the article with it. He honestly didn't know what to say. Amy let go of the album and sat back to allow Ricky to look through the rest of the pages.

With the Album still on his lap, Ricky finally spoke after a long moment of silence between them.

_"Wow, Amy I honestly had no idea"_ He knew about Amy's love for journalism in high school. But this level of talent he just witness was unreal" After a pause he said quietly _"I'm glad you ended up going_"

"_Huh?" _

_"I mean…after all that struggle you went through trying to decide between staying here in California or going to Hudson. It's clear that Hudson was where you were meant to be all along"_

Amy was silent again; she stared down at her hands which were now folded on her lap.

_"Do you ever feel happy about something…then feel guilty about feeling happy about it?"_

_"Amy if you're talking about going to Hudson, there's definitely nothing to feel guilty about. You chased your dreams – despite all the obstacles you had to face. That's something to be admired"_

Amy shook her head, then leaned back and closed her eyes. "_I just feel like I can never win"_

When she opened them again, she spoke. _"Like with John, Ricky having him in my life even at 16 made me feel so…happy. I would look at him and feel like, wow how am I so lucky to have this little boy? But then I felt like it was wrong to be happy about it because I was just a teenager in high school. Like I should be ashamed instead of proud"_

_"Amy you can't beat yourself up about that"_

_"Then there was this Hudson thing. I was really good at my program Ricky. Like really good at it. When I was there, it felt like I was born to be there. I finished 3__rd __in my program. Out of all the people in my program I had the 3__rd__ highest GPA." _

Ricky was shocked. Again he was speechless.

_"But then it felt so wrong to feel so proud of it, because it meant I had abandoned my family to choose my career". _

Ricky tried to find words to say, to comfort Amy. To assure her that there's nothing to feel guilty about. That she should feel nothing but pride about everything she's done these past few years. But he didn't know what to say.

"_And now, it's like I'm being punished. For being happy about all the wrong things"_

_"Amy…"_

_"They don't know what's wrong with me Ricky. I've done a hundred tests and no one has any idea. At first I didn't think it was anything to worry about. But then it kept happening and the dizzy spells, they get worst each time. _

_"Amy you're going to be fine_" Ricky contented, determination in his voice.

Amy's eyes watered. She titled her head back and starred at the ceiling. After a few moments she closed her eyes and whispered. _"I'm so scared_".

A whisper so low; she wasn't even sure herself if she's actually even said it out loud. Three words she's wanted to say out loud for so long – but couldn't. She wasn't sure what finally made her say it out loud now.


	15. Chapter 15

Almost 22 hours after dropping John off at Amy's the night before, Ricky watched TV alone in his living room wearing nothing but his boxers and a white T. The exact same outfit he had woken up in this morning. He didn't get home from Amy's until after midnight and was too tired to even make it up stairs for bed. He ended up passing out on the couch with the TV on, after he had stripped down to his underclothes.

When he woke up at that morning, his thoughts wondered back to the night before with Amy. An image of the two of them sitting on the couch played back in his mind, when she basically told him about all her insecurities. He felt like he needed to do something, to comfort her. To let her know it was Ok. But too much has happened between them and they were not as close as they used to be. Any sign of affection from either of them would just feel awkward. And he doubt whether Amy would welcome it from him. In the end he stayed seated where he was, starring at her as she looked up at the ceiling, her bangs covering part of her left eye. His fingers almost itched as he stopped himself from reaching over and swiping them to the side for her. Instead he said lamely, "Amy, I'm sure everything will be Ok"

She didn't respond. Just closed her eyes. He wasn't even sure if she heard him. Her mind was obviously somewhere else.

The ringing of a phone interrupted his thoughts. A picture of Adrian popped up on his phone's LCD and he realized he hasn't heard from her since he dropped her off at the airport yesterday morning.

_ "Hello beautiful"_

_"Hi babe. Did you just get up?" _

_"Yeah" Ricky laughed. "How are you?"_

_"I had to get up early this morning for the conference. I'm freakin exhausted. We're on a break now, but the next set of workshops is going to start soon. Did you have dinner at your parents?"_

_"Yeah, I dropped of John at Amy's last night after dinner. Amy and I ended up chatting for a bit at her place"_

For some reason, Ricky felt compelled to tell Adrian about staying back at Amy's place, after they had put John to bed. Not that he was feeling guilty about anything. He hadn't done anything to feel guilty about. But knowing Adrian, she would want to know those kinds of details.

_"Oh okay" _A pause_ "About John's schedule?"_

_"No, we actually didn't get a chance to talk about that. We just talked about her work"_

_"Her work? What about it?"_

_"Oh I don't know, just stuff that she's done. She showed me her portfolio and we just got to talking about it"_

_"Alright…well I have to go, I miss you"_

Ricky said goodbye to Adrian. Then grabbed the remote and surfed through several channels before getting up to get some breakfast.

It was almost 9:00 at night when it suddenly dawned on Ricky that he had stayed in all day and haven't accomplished a thing. Despite the fact that the weather was supposed to be 'gorgeous' (according to meteorologist), he hadn't stepped outside once. He definitely just bummed inside all day. He had some left over chicken and a beer for lunch, and attempted to do some work on his computer but ended up spending countless of hours surfing the web. First reading news about up and coming web designers, watched a few YouTube videos on creative marketing and then ended up reading about celebrity gossip for a few hours simply because he had run out of anything else to do. Adrian texted him several times during the day, but the conference ended late and she was going to check out a highly recommended restaurant with some of her colleagues for dinner, so he hasn't spoken to her since that morning.

Around dinner time, he microwaved a bag of popcorn and grabbed another beer from the fridge and hadn't eaten anything else since. Without John and Adrian, there wasn't really anything to do.

He was now back on the couch, with a new bottle of cold beer in his hand when his phone rang again. It was a number he's never seen before.

_"Hello?"_

_"Daddy!"_

_"John?"_ He must be calling from Amy's new phone.

_"Hi Daddy!"_ John said again

Ricky felt a sudden feeling of happiness hearing his son's voice. The boredom was starting to get to him, so much so that he was starting to feel antsy. A few minutes before John's call, he had been seriously considering going out for a late night jog, just for the sake of doing something.

"_Daddy we went to the pond and fed the ducks. Then I played in the splash pad – they had a wading pool and then we went to walk around in the forest and I found these bugs…_"

Ricky listened as John spoke a hundred miles an hour, while he told Ricky all about his day. Hearing all about the exciting day they had, made him feel lonelier.

"_Tomorrow we're going to the circus_!" John said practically screaming on the phone. Ricky could just imagine him bursting with excitement on the other end.

_"You lucky kid! Is Grandpa George going with you?" _

"_No just me and mommy. Do you want to come_?" John asked over the phone

Ricky started to say something. He wouldn't mind going to the circus. If he had to spend another day like today, he would lose his mind. He heard Amy talking in the background and John's stopped talking to listen to what his mother was saying

"_No, tomorrow is still the weekend. Daddy doesn't work on the weekend"_ he heard John say, though he wasn't talking to him. "_Mommy thinks you're busy but I told her you don't do anything on the weekend_" John said protesting on the phone, back to talking to Ricky again.

Suddenly Amy was on the line.

"_Hey Ricky, sorry about that. I know you're probably busy so don't worry about tomorrow. I'm sure John understands_"

"_But he doesn't work on Sundays_!" He heard John whine again in the background.

"_Tomorrows the last day it's here right?"_ Ricky said over the phone

"_Uh yeah, I think so. I mean you're more than welcome_…" Amy's voice trailed off at the invitation.

"_Sure. I've got nothing else better to do. I mean if it's okay with you"_ Ricky said, filling the silence.

"_Oh_" Amy replied, a bit surprised. "_Well of course it's okay, I just don't want you to feel obligated_"

"_Actually it sounds like a lot of fun"_

"_Oh okay then…well…_" Amy wasn't quite sure how to end the conversation.

"_Why don't I meet you guys at your place?"_ Ricky suggested

"_Oh okay. We're going to leave around 11 in the morning. The show starts at 12_"

"_Great, I'll come by around 11 then_"

John came back on the line.

"_You're coming to the circus?!"_ John asked, or rather screamed in a high pitch voice.

Ricky laughed. "_Yeah buddy, I'll be there_"

_"YAYYYY. You're going to have so much fun!"_ He was happy that his dad wasn't going to miss out.

A few minutes later, John and Ricky said goodnight and Ricky downed the rest of his beer, looking forward to the next day.


	16. Chapter 16

"_That was sooo AWESOME! Right Dad?"_

Ricky was carrying John on his back while Amy walked in front of them. Her arms was full of things from the circus including a half-eaten bag of candy corn, John's massive pink cotton candy, a red helium balloon as well as a twisted balloon animal John received from a clown during the show. Despite the fact that it was almost fall in California, the weather still felt like it was the middle of summer.

Amy had on a floral maxi dress and wore her wavy hair up in a short ponytail. She's gotten some colour back in her cheeks and was looking a lot heathier than she has been from the last two weeks. Ricky couldn't help sneaking a few glances here and there during the show. She also has not had any episodes of vertigo since that really bad one before the hospital, so maybe the latest prescriptions she's gotten may be working after all. Though those medication sometimes made her feel worst if anything.

"_I think I want to be a lion trainer when I grow up!"_ John exclaimed

"_And we would support you and be proud of you if that was what made you happy_" Ricky said half joking.

Amy looked back at John and Ricky. "_Don't give him any ideas_" She said rolling her eyes.

"_Why? I happen to think lion training to be a fine profession_" Ricky replied smugly, teasing a little. After bumming around all of Saturday, this day had put him in a really good mood.

Amy decided not to comment, as she shook her head and continue to lead the two out of the circus. They stopped when they reached Ricky's car, which was parked on the gravel lot several meters from where the tent was set up.

_"__It's still pretty early"_ Ricky said letting one arm go of John's leg to check his watch. The circus lasted only a few hours and it was now only 3 o'clock.

"_I want ice cream!"_ John proclaimed, still pretty hyper from all the excitement of the day.

_"__I think you've had enough sugar for the day…or this week actually"_ Amy pointed out.

"_What about grabbing a late lunch at your dad's restaurant?"_ Ricky suggested.

"Yay we're going to see Grandpa George!" John cried out from behind Ricky.

"_Alright, I guess it's decided then_" Amy said, as she opened the back car door for Ricky and John.

"To Grandpa's!" John exclaimed as he climbed into his booster seat.

"To Grandpa's!" Amy replied smiling.

Ricky climbed into the driver seat and closed the door. "_To Grandpas_" he said, as he put the car into gear, smiling at John from the review mirror.

20 minutes later, they were pulling into the restaurants parking lot. As Ricky put the car into park, John couldn't contain his excitement and took his seatbelt off, ready to jump out as soon as Ricky opened the door. He loved coming to his grandpa's restaurant. John has spent a lot of time with his grandfather while his mother was in New York and he knew the restaurant very well. He was very popular amongst the restaurant staff and cooks. When he was a little bit younger, he would follow some of the experienced waitress around while he 'wrote' their order on a note pad. The wait staff were good enough to remember orders in their head, without writing it down – which made John feel like he was actually in charge of taking the orders. The customers always got a good laugh out of it. Then they would go to the computer and John would hand his scribbles to the waitress and they would pretend to read out the order from his little note pad, as they punched in into the system.

John was particular fond of Rico, the head chef. Whenever John was there, he would let him put on an apron and let him be the 'sous chef', usually giving him the task of picking herbs off their stem or putting last minute garnishes on top of pasta dishes. If John ended up becoming a chef later on in life, George wouldn't be the least surprised. He's gotten great hands on training from very early on.

Ricky opened the door for John and Amy. Immediately Sarah, the college student working there as the front of the house, greeted John. "_Well hello, Mr. John, your usual table today?_" Sarah said, smiling at the 7 year old, then looked up and winked at Ricky.

Ricky smiled back. Sarah was a trusted friend of the family, and because of John, Ricky was considered part of the clan. She knew everyone's story well. She never judge or gave her own opinion, only listened and gave advice but only when asked.

She reached over to give Amy a hug. "_How are you Amy_?"

_"__I'm good_" Amy replied as she leaned in to reciprocate Sarah's hug.

John led everyone to the table usually saved for family or close friends of George.

"_Surprised to see the two of you together_" Sarah whispered to Amy as they followed behind John and Ricky.

"_John wanted him to come to the circus with us"_ Amy said, shrugging her shoulders.

Finally they got to the table at the back of the restaurant near the kitchen. "_I'll let the boss know you're here_" Sarah winked, as soon as they were seated.

A few minutes later George showed up and took a seat in the booth beside Ricky. He was also a bit surprised to see the three in together at the restaurant, but also knew enough to not say anything and act as if not a thing was out of place. Which is exactly what he did.

_"__What's my favourite little customer having today?"_

"_Burgers_!" John exclaimed, climbing over his mom to get out of the booth.

_"__I'm assuming you're making it yourself?"_

"Of course!" John said, already taking George hand to pull him towards the kitchen, making the three adults around him chuckle. "Lets go Grandpa, I'm starving!"

"Alright, Alright I'm coming" George uttered as he slid off the booth, then looked back at the table to Amy and Ricky.

"What are you two kids going to have?"

"Whatever you think is good" Ricky responded

"Yeah, tell Rico I give him creative control, but make it quick! We're starving" Amy said.

"Alright two off the menu orders coming up" George said, before disappearing through the kitchen doors with John.

Later that night, Ricky sat on the couch making himself comfortable. It was only a little after 8 and John had just gone to bed. Because the next day was a school night, they kept to the same schedule as they have been all summer. John with Ricky during the weekdays, and then with Amy on the weekends.

The original plan for the day was for Ricky to pick up John's from Amy's at 5, then both heading to Margaret and Sanjay's house for dinner. However, Ricky getting invited to the circus had changed the plans slightly so Ricky ended up asking Amy if she wanted to come along to dinner.

_ "__Oh I don't know Ricky, I don't want to just show up when they're not expecting me" _

_"__Don't be ridiculous Amy you know they'll be happy to see you" _

Because Amy was having a good day (no headaches or dizziness, thank god), and she also wasn't ready for this fun day to end, she agreed.

Margaret and Sanjay were of course ecstatic to see Amy. Neither has seen each other since she's left for New York four years ago, so the whole evening was filled with questions about New York and her program. Margaret and Sanjay are the kind of people you don't mind sharing your life story with. Amy tried to give them as much details about college as she could without being too overwhelming. She also mentioned to them that she was currently writing pieces for an online magazine.

"Oh that's wonderful!" Margaret exclaimed "We should check it out" she said looking at Sanjay placing a hand over his.

"Of course, of course" he nodded with a smile,

As they were leaving Margaret had pulled Amy into a hug and whispered "_Don't be a stranger, you stop by any time okay?"_

Amy replied by giving her a kiss on the cheek and then turned to give Sanjay a hug, before walking out with Ricky and John.

_"__Gosh I forgot how amazing Margaret and Sanjay are"_ Amy said as they three of them stepped out of the apartment doors and walked out to Ricky's car.

A cool breeze forced Amy to wrap her arms around herself. The temperature has dropped drastically, after the sun had set. She had not been expecting to be out past the afternoon, and wasn't exactly prepared for the cooler temperature. Ricky, being a gentleman, offered her his coat, which Amy draping it around her shoulders.

Now in the car, Amy had her head turned looking at the window, Ricky driving her back to her apartment. Her arms folded in front of her.

_"__I told you they would be excited to see you"_ Ricky said taking his eyes of the road for a few seconds to look at her _"Maybe a little too excited. Sorry about all the questions"_

_"__No I really don't mind. I always thought of them like my second parents" _

_"__Yeah well, they sort of have that effect on people"_ Ricky chuckled as he drove on.

"Well thanks for letting me tag along today" Ricky said, when he finally pulled up in front of Amy's apartment.

"Sure…I mean, John was really happy that you could come" She said turning her head to look back at the sleeping 7 year old in the back seat.

"I don't know how I'm going to get him up for school tomorrow" Ricky said chuckling, following Amy's gaze.

An awkward silence now filled the car. Neither one of them exactly sure on how to end the night. Do they hug? Shake hands? They haven't spoken to each other in so long, and here they were spending a whole day together.

Finally, Amy pulled Ricky's jacket off her shoulders and handed it back to him as she opened the door – "Thanks for the jacket"

"No problem" Ricky said, taking the jacket from her.

"Okay well, goodnight" Amy said as she finally stepped out of the car

"Right. Goodnight Amy"

As Ricky settled himself on the couch, after John had gone to bed, he realized that he hasn't checked his phone all day. He pulled his mobile device from the leather jacket he had on that day and saw that he had about 8 missed calls. His voicemail was full. Sure enough they were all from Adrian.

"_Shit_" he said out loud as he scrolled through the text messages and listened to the voicemails.

He tapped on her name to call her, ready to get reamed out. The call went to voicemail. He tried calling again, and again it went to voicemail.

Knowing Adrian, she was pissed and was purposely ignore her call. He decided to leave a message and send a few texts out to her.

"_Hi babe, sorry about missing all your messages today. It's been a long day. Anyways, I know you get back tomorrow, and you're probably really upset but I can't wait to see you. Call me back okay. Let me know what time I should be at the airport". _

Ricky sighed, then put his phone down on the couch beside him. He decided to keep it near him in case Adrian called. Missing another call would be risky.

It's such a shame, he thought, after the fun day he's had today – he would have to face some very negative consequences tomorrow. Maybe he can pick up some flowers on the way to the airport to sweeten the blow.


	17. Chapter 17

**Author's Note: Thanks again for all the reviews. They are very much loved. I enjoy hearing your thoughts about how the story is going :) **

Ricky got to the airport a bit earlier than Adrian had been expecting him. His car was parked at the passenger pick up lane, while he waited outside the terminal for Adrian. He brought along a dozen red roses as part of his apology for missing all her calls yesterday. He decided to be a gentleman and waited outside the car holding the bouquet. When Adrian spotted him however, she didn't even acknowledge him. Without a word, she walked up to the back of the car, opened the trunk and dumped her luggage in. Ricky jogged around to try to help her but she shrugged him off. Then she walked around the car, sat in the passenger seat and closed the door without uttering a word to Ricky.

_"__Man she's pissed"_ Ricky said to himself as he walked around the car to the get into the drivers side.

He opened the door and got in.

_"__Adrian, I'm sorry about yesterday. I got these for you"_ Ricky said offering her the flowers. He was trying to be cute. However, it didn't phase Adrian.

"_Alright then, I'm just going to place it in the back seat here"_ Ricky exaggerating the gesture, hoping to lighten the mood between them. Though, Adrian remained unresponsive and continued to ignore Ricky staring straight ahead, not uttering a sound.

_"__Adrian, come on…"_ Ricky pleaded, but Adrian continued to give him the silent treatment.

Finally Ricky gave up. He grabbed the steering wheel and drove out of the airport for home. When they were 10 minutes away from the house, Ricky had an idea.

"_You know"_ Ricky started slyly "_I've really missed you…and we do have the house all to ourselves right now" _

Still Adrian said nothing, but she rolled her eyes and shook her head. Ricky knew her enough to understand that he was getting through.

He placed a hand on her upper thigh, caressing it a bit. "_What do you say Adrian…I can't wait to show you just how much I missed you"_ Ricky said slyly.

This was enough to get a smile out of Adrian. Finally, the anger that Adrian had been holding on to diffused and she gave in to Ricky's flirtatious advances. "_Well in that case, I can't wait to let you show me how much you've missed me"_ Adrian said, breaking the silent treatment.

Ricky smiled. Success! He thought smugly to himself.

Ricky stroked Adrian's hair, while she laid her head on his bare chest.

"_I'm sorry I was so mad at you_" Adrian said.

_"__I'm sorry I missed your calls yesterday Adrian, I really am"_

_"__What was so important that you couldn't pick up any of my calls anyway?"_ Adrian finally asked.

_"__John and Amy had invited me to the circus with them and the day just got away from us_" Ricky said truthfully.

Adrian suddenly pulled away from Ricky's embrace and slowly sat up on the bed and looked at him.

"_Wait, you're telling me…_" She said started slowly "T_hat the reason you ignored all my calls yesterday was because you were with Amy?!_" Adrian finished, her voice rising at the end.

Ricky now sat up too, not understanding why Adrian was getting so upset.

_"__Adrian, I wasn't ignoring your calls – and it wasn't because of Amy"_

_"__You just said! You went to the circus with Amy!"_

_"__Yes and John; Adrian, John was there too. I went, BECAUSE of John"_

"_So explain to me again, why you couldn't pick up any of my phone calls Ricky, because I was calling you ALL DAY"_

_"__I told you, the day just got away from us"_

_"__What does that MEAN EXACTLY_?" She said her voice getting louder, then in a mocking tone _"The day got away from us? What the hell is that supposed to mean?"_

Ricky took a deep breath, and tried to speak in a calm and even tone. He knew if he showed even the slightest sign of frustration, Adrian will go off on him for thinking he was getting mad at her, which he wasn't and the whole thing will be blown way out of proportion. He's had enough experience getting through fights with Adrian to know to tread very lightly.

_"__John had called and invited me to come to the circus with him and Amy"_ Ricky started "W_e ended up going to Geoff's for lunch and I invited her over to have dinner with me and John at my parents. By the time John and I got home it was already pretty late and I still had to get him ready for bed and then actually PUT him to bed. Adrian, I didn't get a chance to check my phone until late last night" _

_"__OH…MY GOD. I don't believe this!"_ Adrian said, getting out of bed, furiously she started throwing her clothes back on.

_"__I don't see what the big deal is Adrian. I was just trying to spend some time with my son"_

_"__We get John all week! Let Amy have her time with him" _

_"__And she does Adrian. John just wanted me there too. What reason did I have to say no to him?"_

"_Okay"_ Adrian said slowly, stretching out her words, trying to also reason with Ricky _"What reason did you have to spend the whole day with her?"_

_"__Adrian, you're making a big deal out of nothing_" Ricky now too had gotten out of bed and was putting his pants on.

Adrian just shook her head and walked out of their bedroom, slamming the door behind her in anger.

A few hours later, after Ricky had tucked John into bed, he went downstairs, where Adrian was sitting in silence in the kitchen doing some paper work she's taken home with her. She really didn't need to get it done, since it wasn't due till the end of the week, but their fight had left her with nothing else better to do.

Ricky poured himself a glass of water and stood by the kitchen sink and turned to face Adrian.

_"__Listen, Adrian. I'm sorry I missed your calls, and didn't think about calling you until the end of the night...I really don't want to fight with you."_

Adrian looked up.

_"__It's not about missing my calls Ricky. You spent the whole day with Amy and didn't even care to think about me once! How would you feel if it was the other way around? If you found out I spent the whole day with some guy and then was like oops sorry Ricky totally forgot about you"_

Ricky knelt down in front of Adrian and took both her hands into his. He looked up at her and stared into her eyes.

_"__I know, and I should have remembered to check in. I'm at fault and I'm sorry_". Ricky was trying to end this fight with Adrian. If he had to admit he was in the wrong and apologize first, he wasn't above that.

Adrian pulled her hands away from Ricky's. "_It's not just about yesterday Ricky. Lately, it's like you're not even here anymore" _

"_Adrian, what are you talking about_?" Ricky said, looking confused, as he sat back on his heels. _"I'm with you all the time"_

Adrian shook her head and started to speak, not looking at Ricky.

"_Since that day when you took Amy to the hospital, you've been preoccupied. And when I really think about it, I feel like you've been preoccupied for the past 2 months. I just couldn't put a finger on what it was"_

Ricky got up away from Adrian and leaned against the counter, his eyes narrowing in anger. Though despite the growing anger he was feeling, he slowed his mind carefully choosing the words he was going to say next.

"I haven't been thinking about Amy for the past two months Adrian, if that's what you're accusing me of" Ricky's voice though slow and steady, was now rising a little.

"That day when you came home from the hospital…" Adrian started, but Ricky cut her off.

"….and I told you if you would have just SEEN her Adrian, you would have been worried too. Anyone with a conscience would have worried just the same"

Adrian felt like she had been slapped. Was Ricky trying to suggest she didn't have a heart?

"God Ricky, listen to yourself!" Adrian was now shouting, and though she tried hard to hold them back, tears filled her eyes. Her emotions were becoming beyond her control, her body fueling with rage.

_"__I don't have to Adrian, I'm trying to be understanding but I don't exactly know what you're trying to accuse me off here"._ Adrian wasn't the only one feeling anger; Ricky too, was now fuming. He took no notice of the tears that were filling Adrian's eyes. She had no right to accuse him of thinking only about Amy. He had been honest with Adrian from the beginning, hid nothing from her. Since Amy has been back, heck even before that, he consistently made an effort to show her that he could be trusted. If that didn't show that he was thinking about her, then he didn't know what else she wanted from him. And for her to think that all he thought about was Amy these past few months? She knew better than anyone that up until a few days ago, they couldn't stand each other.

For a while neither of them said anything. Finally Adrian spoke, her cheeks wet with the tears that had flown over from her eyes.

_ "__You know what, I think we need to take a break and cool off" _

"_Yeah great idea, I'll take the couch tonight_" Ricky stated and started to head upstairs to grab a blanket and a pillow.

_"__Don't bother. I'm not staying here"_

Ricky stopped and turned back around, "_What?"_

_"__I think I'm going to stay at my dad's for a few days"_

_"__That's what you want to do?"_

_"__I think so"_ Adrian said, her shoulders dropping.

Ricky didn't know what else to do but to let Adrian do what she wanted. He turned back around and continued to go upstairs. Instead of heading to the bedroom, he turned and walked towards John's room to check on him.


	18. Chapter 18

Ricky reached for what was probably his 10th cup of coffee that day. He still hasn't heard from Adrian since their fight a few nights ago, and now he had this big presentation he needed to worry about for tomorrow. His team was finally going to pitch their project to the executives who hired them to do their ad campaign and he's been spending most of his waking hours perfecting the fine details. The meeting was set up for first thing Friday morning, and a lot was riding on it. If they land this, they would score the biggest account their marketing firm has ever had. They couldn't present anything less than perfection.

The fight with Adrian, the project and taking care of John on his own, had really worn him down. This morning he decided to call Amy and see if she could take John a day earlier that she usual. Amy agreed, though he wasn't surprised. He knew she would welcome any time she could spend with John.

He heard the bell ring and figured it was probably Amy. He practically slept walked to the door. Man he was exhausted.

_"__Hey Amy, come on in. John's upstairs…I think"_

_"__Uh whoa. You look terrible, no offence" _Amy replied when a completely dishevelled looking Ricky open the door.

_"__Why is it that girls can so openly say that to guys, but when we do it you get all offended_" Ricky was tired, but not lacking sarcasm. He stepped aside to let Amy in.

Amy reluctantly stepped inside,_ "Adrian here?"_ she hopped that sounded casual enough, as though she didn't care whether she was or wasn't.

_"__She's uh not here"_ Ricky didn't exactly want to get into it at the moment. _"Sorry, it's been just me this whole week and I've been drowning in work, so I really appreciate you helping me out" _

Ricky called out to John from where he stood and didn't get a response back.

Amy brushed her bangs to the side with her hand, immediately feeling a bit badly for Ricky. Even though she was also on her own, her work load was probably much lighter and she had the luxury of working from home and choosing her own hours when it came to writing.

_"__Oh, yeah of course Ricky. I mean I didn't realize...why didn't you tell me? I could have just kept John with me this week. I guess Adrian isn't back from her trip?" _

"_Something like that"_ Ricky said mumbling then walking towards the stairs to call out to John again. When he didn't get a response he decided to just go upstairs to get him.

_"__Sorry just a minute. Make yourself comfortable. I'll bring John right down"_

_"__Uh yeah sure"._ Amy didn't exactly feel comfortable making herself at home. So she just stood waiting by the door.

A few minutes later, Ricky was walking back down the stairs but still without John.

"_He's just picking up some of his toys, then he'll be right down. His bag is in the kitchen. Come on in. I just have to make sure he has everything_." Amy followed Ricky to the kitchen.

"_Whoa_!" Amy said taken aback when she saw the place. "_What's going on here_?"

The place looked like a printing shop that had just exploded. The kitchen table was covered with piles of paper with what looked like spreadsheets and illustration boards. There were a couple of larger drawing boards leaning against a chair. Two laptops and a tablet sat opened amongst the piles of paper on the table, along with a couple baseball hats. A few take out bags and coffee cups lined the kitchen counter. She also noticed an open box filled with what looked like workout clothing, on the floor.

"_Yeah, sorry about all this_" Ricky said as he went through John's backpack, making sure it had everything he needed for the next day. "_It's this account my team has been working on. We're doing the ad campaign for Below Zero_". Ricky explained as he went through John's bag, making sure he had everything he needed for school the next day.

"_The sports clothing company? As in the new NIKE of the 21st century?"_ Amy asked, her eyes wide almost in disbelief.

_"__The very one" _

Amy walked over to the table and picked up one of the ad spreads. "_Oh wow, this is amazing_" Amy said genuinely impressed.

Ricky sighed. He however, was not very impressed. Instead he was thinking about all the work he still had to do by tomorrow. "_Thanks. Now I just have to go through the proposal_" He zipped up John's backpack and found an empty spot on the counter to put it on, then walked over to the fridge and grabbed a red bull. "_I don't know how I got the job of editing this. The way my brain is working right now, I'm the least person who should even be allowed near this thing. I've been over this thing so many times, the letters just blur together_" Ricky said, as he zipped up John's backpack.

Amy placed the ad spread she had been looking at, back on top of the pile along with the others.

_"__You need any help?"_ she offered, looking at him.

Ricky rubbed his face, not really sure what Amy was trying to help him with. He was ready to crawl on the couch and take a nap. Which he thought was actually not a bad idea. _"What do you mean?"_

Amy eyed Ricky, his eyes were red, and his hair was going in all directions. He was a wreck.

"_I did get my degree in journalism Ricky. Grammar and spell checking is kind of my forte. I can go through your proposal for you"_

Ricky snapped his head up to look at Amy. She suddenly had his full attention "Wait, _What, Really? I mean…you don't have to" _He stammered_ "but I would actually really appreciate it" _

Amy laughed at Ricky's sudden renewal of energy. "_Sure, I don't mind. It is what I do all day or SHOULD be doing. _Amy said, acknowledging her lack of work ethic lately.

_Why don't you go take a nap or a shower…or something_" Amy continued as though reading Ricky's mind. Just then John bounced his usual cheerful self into the kitchen.

"_Mommy_!"

_"__Hi baby, I missed you!"_ Amy said as John walked up to her to give her a hug.

_"__Are we going to your house now?" _

_"__Actually you know what, I'm going to help your dad out with his work for a bit. Why don't you watch some TV and I'll let you know when we're ready to go, okay?"_

"_Oh good, dad's work is driving me bonkers!"_ John said as he walked out of the kitchen into the living room.

_"__Hey this work is what feeds this family you know! And paid for your soccer camp and that new bike you got"_ Ricky called out. Then shook his head at Amy, _"Honestly, 7 years old and he's already giving me sarcasm"_

_"__Gee I wonder where he gets it from"_

"_Obviously not from me_"

Amy just rolled her eyes and sat down at the kitchen table.

_"__I think I'm going to your advice about the shower" _

"_Thank god, you stink"_ Amy jested, making herself comfortable in front the computer.

_"__Give me a break, I've been practically a one man show for the past 4 days"_

_"__Will you just go?"_ Amy ordered, not turning around

When Ricky had gone back down after his shower, Amy had already done several sweeps of Ricky's proposal and was finishing up her last edit.

Ricky took a seat beside her. _"So? How is it?"_

_"__It's really good actually"_

_"__You seem surprised"_

"_No because I know you didn't come up with this all on your own_" Amy retorted not wanting to feed his ego, which was obviously inflating in front of her.

"_Ohhhh yeah? Well the concept right there_" Ricky boasted, pointing at the screen "_that's all me baby!"_

This time Amy didn't even attempt to stop her eyes from rolling, however she also couldn't help the smile that had formed on her face.

"_Okay but seriously though, it's good. Just a few things_…"

Amy offered a few suggestions, pointing out a few phrases or paragraphs that could be reworded to make their points stronger. In no time, the two had polished the proposal to a level they were both very satisfied with.

"_annndd…..DONE!"_ Amy declared smiling, as she punched in the final changes on the key board and then clicked save.

Satisfied with the work they just put in, Ricky grinned and offered his hand up to Amy for a high five, which Amy reciprocated.

Ricky turned the computer towards him "_Now…just have to email it out to the rest of the team…and then I can send it to get printed and bound!"_

He was confident that the proposal was an absolute winner. Now he just had to work on his pitch.

A short while later, the three of them were standing by the front door. John and Amy was getting ready to leave.

_ "__Thanks again Amy, I owe you big time" _Ricky said looking a lot more renewed than when Amy first got there.

Amy took John's hand after he got up from putting on his shoes_ "Don't mention it"_

_"__No really, up until a few hours ago, I didn't know how I was going to get through all this. I was thinking I would have had to pull an all nighter before the biggest pitch of my life_"

Amy gave him a reassuring smile, "_Well I'm sure you'll do great. The project looks pretty boss. I can't imagine them turning it down"_

"_Well you really never know with these things, it could be the smallest detail they don't like or they can suddenly change their vision last minute"_ He said suddenly looking worried.

_"__Come on mommy lets go" _John tugging at his mom's hand.

"_Alright well…good luck!"_ Amy said as she and John walked out of Ricky's apartment.

"_Thanks Amy_" Then bent down to say goodbye to John "_Night buddy, be good okay? And take care of your mommy"_

Amy looked at Ricky and gave him a smile, appreciating the comment he just made.

"_I will daddy"_ John said giving his dad a hug, before he turned to walk towards the car with his mother.


	19. Chapter 19

**Authors Note: This was initially written as one chapter but then I broke it down into two - so two updates for you! Hope you enjoy! **

It was just after 2 in the afternoon on Saturday, when Amy heard her phone beep. She was working on an article and John was in the living room building some village for the past hour on his tablet. Amy didn't mind as it gave her a chance to get some writing done. Assuming it was just one of her parents checking up on her, she half-heartedly picked up her phone knowing all too well the consequences if she didn't respond instantly, to reassure them she was fine.

She was surprised, however when she saw Ricky's name on the display. She tap the screen to open the message.

**Thanks again for all your help and for picking up John last minute. PS WE GOT THE ACCOUNT! ****J****J**

A sound of glee escaped from Amy's lips. Even though she barely did anything, she felt ecstatic for Ricky. When she had gotten home that night from his house, she couldn't help but think about Ricky, and how much he's changed. It wasn't a bad thing. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but something was different about Ricky. He seemed more mature and driven.

Instead of texting back a reply she decided to call him instead.

"Amy?"

"_OMG! Congratulations!"_ Amy said not hiding her excitement

On the other end, Ricky smiled.

_"__Thanks Amy"_

"_Well you sound awfully boring for someone who just landed - wait what was it you said the other night? - The biggest account of your life?"_

She heard Ricky chuckle.

Ricky ran his fingers through is hair. "_To be honest, it all feels surreal. The guys and I went out to celebrate last night and …well needless to say I don't remember parts of it, so it was a great nigh_t" Ricky realized he must have been grinning like an idiot, but he was happy and there was no one around so looking cool was the least of his priorities.

_"__Well deserved of course"_

_"__I have a killer headache"_

_"__but probably so worth it"_

Ricky laughed "_It sure was"_

_"__We should all go out and celebrate; you did have a part in it too"_

Ricky was thinking about her and John when he extended the invitation to celebrate just then, but Amy assumed something else when Ricky said '_all go out'_. Amy paused. She wasn't sure. Was she ready to hang out with Ricky and Adrian together? However, she did need to get over it at some point. Now or never she guessed.

_"__Okay, yeah - sure. I mean a celebration is in order"_

_"__Well what are you and John doing tomorrow night?"_

"OH!" Amy exclaimed, suddenly remembering what she wanted to ask Ricky "_That reminds me, my dad was wondering if he could take John with him and Robbie to some Disney on ice show? It starts at 7pm, so it might end pretty late, but I think he's keeping Robbie home from Kindergarten on Monday. I can keep John with me too on Monday, to give you a bit of a break_"

_"__Oh, well I was going to ask if you and John wanted to go out for a celebratory dinner. My treat of course, but…." _

Ricky paused, however, he was feeling pretty untouchable at the moment so he continued,

"_if you're free, our company has box seats to tomorrow night's hockey game. I wasn't planning on going but since it sounds like everyone is taking the Monday off_…" Ricky trailed off letting the invitation linger.

"Uh, _won't Adrian mind?"_ Amy asked surprised.

_"__Yeah, about that"_ Amy heard Ricky sigh on the other end.

"_Oh she not back from her trip yet_?" Amy interrupted. Even still, knowing Adrian she doubts she'll be happy about her and Ricky hanging out, company outing or not.

"_No uh actually_…" Ricky stuttered, he didn't want to talk about Adrian at this moment but he knew an explanation was inevitable at this point.

"_We got in a really bad fight earlier this week. She's been staying at her dad's…so I don't think she gives a crap about what I do right now_" He said the last part in a tone that made him sound bitter.

"Oh" Amy wasn't sure what to say next. The news was surprising though it made the events of the past few days regarding Ricky a bit clearer.

_"__Want to talk about it?" _Amy frowned and bit her bottom lip. Was that appropriate? But she felt that not acknowledging Ricky's response would probably make things weirder. It was better to get rid of the elephant in the room as soon as it showed up.

"_Yah no not really_"

Relief washed through Amy as she released air from her lungs, she didn't realize she was holding.

"_Oh but it's a company outing?"_ Replied Amy, turning the subject back to their original conversation.

"_It's an event for the marketing team. We're allowed to bring a guest…I mean we don't have to, so if you don't want…"_

Hockey? What do I know about hockey? Oh what the hell Amy thought, it was a few hours of one night. It could be fun.

"_Alright…well, okay then!"_ Amy declared cheerfully, trying to sound upbeat for Ricky's sake _"Why not? Let's go to the game!"_

Ricky's smile returned. "_Perfect, I can pick you up, let's say around 6, but I'll text you when I'm on my way"_


	20. Chapter 20

The next day, Ricky had just gotten out of the shower getting ready to pick up Amy, when he heard his phone ring. He saw the number and recognized it was Amy's.

_"__Hey what's up?"_

_"__Hey, I was thinking I could just drive over there. I have to drop John off at my dad's and since you're close by it makes more sense for me to just go straight there than drive all the way home"_

_"__You sure? I don't mind. There's going to be drinks. It might be easier if you just leave your car"_

_"__If there was a risk of one of us not being able to drive home after tonight, I'm sure it won't be me. And there's always a cab"_

"_Actually that probably makes the most sense. We can just cab it from my place, that way neither of us has to worry about driving home. I can always pick you up to get your car back tomorrow"_

_"__Okay, I guess I'll call you when I'm outside"_

Less than half an hour after hanging up, Ricky's phone rang again. She can't possibly be here already he thought. It was way too early.

"Don't tell me you're here already?"

"What?" The voice did not belong to Amy.

"_Oh, Adrian…hi"_ Ricky said stuttering. He was so shocked after not hearing from her for the week he found himself sitting down at the edge of the bed.

_"__Who did you think it was?"_

_"__What?"_

_"__When you picked up"_

_"__Oh this guy from work, dropping something I left in his car"_ He lied

"_Oh okay…well um hi Ricky"_

_"__Hey Adrian…"_ He spoke slowly.

"Listen…" She paused "I was thinking about what happened_. And maybe I over reacted_"

_"__No, no I mean I guess I understand why you would be mad"_ Ricky responded, his mind was all over the place.

_"__No you're right. I guess I was just I don't know…What I'm trying to say is – I want to come home"_

Ricky was stunned. His mind, which was racing just a few seconds ago suddenly went blank. He didn't know how to feel about this. I mean this is what he wanted right? For Adrian to forgive him and to come home. To be honest, he's been so busy these past few days that he didn't have time to think about his fight with Adrian or how he felt about it. But this was his relationship and he vowed to make things right this time around.

"_Uhm that's great Adrian! I'm so glad! I've wanted to fix this since you left"_ Ricky chocked out, his voice was squeaking worst than a hormonal teenager.

_"__So I guess I'll see you soon? We should talk about what happened"_

_"__NO!"_ Ricky practically screamed on the phone

_"__No?"_ Adrian repeated, startled.

"_I mean yeah…but uhm…the hockey game. With the guys_." Ricky closed his eyes and pinched his forehead. He knew he sounded like an idiot but he was royally screwed right now. He knew he couldn't say no to Adrian or he could say goodbye to their relationship. This was what they called it a 'Do or Die' moment.

"_Oh right!"_ Adrian said finally understanding _"That's tonight right? I guess the talk can wait"_

"Yes!" Ricky proclaimed, throwing the hand not holding the phone up the air "_Absolutely the talk can wait_" Though no one was in the room, he was nodding profusely as he spoke into the receiver.

"_But after tonight we can have the talk, whenever you want. Just say when and we'll have it. If you say it's time to talk then I will stop whatever I am doing and we'll have the talk"_ Ricky was feeling really flustered at this point, he spoke without taking a breath.

_"__Okaaay, great. Well I guess I have enough time to get ready"_

"_Huh?"_ Now he was really confused. Get ready for what? Didn't she just agree to have the talk another time?

_"__OMG Ricky what is with you right now? The hockey game. You're still allowed to bring a guest?"_

Slowly, things were becoming clearer. He had told Adrian about the game last week, before she left for her trip to Seattle. Now she was assuming that she was going to go with him. He was fucked.

"_Uh yeah Adrain….Listen um can I call you back? I just have to confirm something with uh one of the guys"_ He lied, slapping a hand to his forehead.

He heard Adrian sign in frustration

_"__Okay, fine whatever Ricky"_

_"__I promise, I will call you back right away"_

_"__Yeah sure…bye"_ The line went dead

What the hell am I doing? Frustrated with himself, he dialed Amy's number.

"Ricky?"

"_heey Amy listen"_

"_What wrong?"_

How did she know that? How did she know something was wrong? All he said was hey.

"_Nothing, actually uh did you leave your house yet_?" He decided right then it would be rude to cancel if she was already on her way. He would just have to deal with Adrian later.

"_Nope not yet. It's still pretty early no?"_

She was right, it was just after 5. He felt a pang of disappointment.

"_Yeah it is, actually ok there might be a slight problem_" Ricky was trying to choose his words carefully but he just couldn't get it together to make any sense right now.

_"__Are you okay?" _He can hear the concern in her voice and he suddenly felt like the biggest jerk in the world. He decided it was best to be honest with her.

_"__Yeah I'm fine. Listen Amy, I don't know how to tell you this but, well Adrian called"_

"Oh"

Damn it. This was a lot harder than he thought. Ricky realized she was waiting for him to go on.

"_She called to say she wanted to come home and talk about….our relationship. I think she wants to fix things"_ Ricky felt his breathing grow heavier with each word he spoke. Was this what hyperventilation feel like? Was he hyperventilating right now?

"Oh right…well that's great, isn't it?"

_"__Yeah, the thing is I forgot I had told her about the game last week and now she kind of assumed that…."_ Ricky's voice trailed off and his eyes pinched shut, as he rubbed one hand over his eye, not being able to continue his sentence.

"_You would take her"_ Amy finished for him.

"_No I mean, I'm already in the dog house. I haven't said no, because well you can imagine if I told her I was already going with someone else…but I didn't say yes either"_

Amy didn't say anything for a few seconds. Finally she responded.

"_Right of course, you should tell her yes. Whatever you guys fought about, I'm sure it wouldn't help if you told her she couldn't go tonight, after you had already invited her"_

You Amy. He wanted to say. We fought about you. Why? - She would ask. Because you're important to me and I think she feels threatened.

"_No, Amy. Listen I already asked you. And she just called 5 minutes ago, after we already set up the plan. I mean, If she had called last night or even earlier today…it might be a different story"_

Wait what the hell is he saying? He didn't plan this. He was supposed to be cancelling on Amy. It was for the sake of his relationship, but he found himself continuing.

"_It's not fair if I cancel on you now, just because Adrian called. If you tell me you want to go, I'll call Adrian right now and tell her I already made different plans"_

Again, the line went silent for a few minutes.

"_Ricky I don't think it would be a good idea for me to go with you now"_ Amy said, being practical

"_Right, I know. I just, god - I just want to do the right thing Amy_" He said it so low it was barely audible. Was she upset with him? He hated conundrums like these and hated even more that he was putting Amy in the middle of it.

She can hear the sound of defeat in his voice.

_"__Of course you do Ricky. And the right thing would be to try and work on your relationship. And right now she's giving you the opportunity to do that" _Amy stated.

"_Stop being so reasonable_" Then he was mortified at himself. He didn't mean to say that, it just slipped out.

Amy just laughed. It was good to hear her laugh, despite the fact that he was being such an ass to her.

"_Well I better go get John to my dad's_" he heard her say quietly over the line.

Shit. Not only was he cancelling on Amy, he was also leaving her alone tonight, without plans.

"_Amy are you sure? I can say no to Adrian. I can_" Ricky heard himself saying again. He was ridden with guilt.

"_Ricky Underwood"_ Amy said in an authoritarian voice "_You hang up. Tell Adrian you're glad she's coming with you tonight, and sort out your relationship. Alright?"_

"_Amy…"_

"_Alright?"_ She repeated.

What else could he say? She was letting him off the hook.

"_Yeah, Alright_" he sighed

_"__Wait Amy…"_

_"__Geez Ricky what now?"_

_"__Thanks…I will do whatever I need to do to make this up to you. I swear. I…_" But Amy cut him off.

"_Ricky…stop. It's fine alright. Go have fun tonight_".

Ricky said goodbye to Amy and then finally hung up, feeling like the worst human being on the planet.


	21. Chapter 21

**NOTE: I had to repost - not sure what happened with the formatting. I know this story is dragging on. I hadn't meant for it to go on for so long. I will try and wrap up this story soon. Promise :) Thanks for all of you who support this story. I appreciate all your feedback!**

Amy almost slammed her laptop shut. She has been trying to write a new piece for the blog since she got back home a few hours ago. Since her plans were cancelled for the night, she figured she could use this time to bang out a couple of articles. It's been a while since she's submitted a piece for the online magazine and she really needed to start making some cash again. However, instead of getting anything done, she was suffering from a major case of writers block. After a few more minutes of not getting anything done, she finally decided to give up and call it a night.

She was about to make her way to couch and maybe binge watch her favourite 80s movies, when her phone rang.

_"__Jeurgens! What up bruh"_

_"__What do you want Ben?"_

_"__Listen I am bored as hell. There's no one here but my supposed sister – though I really think I should investigate into this. There's been a lot of those cases of people misleading celebrities with their identity, sob story and all. Pretty sure this one is after the family money"_

_"__SHUT UP BEN!"_ Amy heard Chloe, Ben's adopted sister, yell in the background

"_God stop spying on my conversation. Where can a guy have a private conversation around here…oww stop that"_

Despite what other people might think. This was the way the two siblings showed affection for each other.

"_Ben what do you want"_ Amy asked again.

_"__I'm coming over"_

_"__What?"_

_"__I'm bored. You're obviously at home, because let's be honest, what else do single moms do on a Sunday night?"_

"_Careful Ben"_ Amy warned "_You starting to get hurtful_"

"_I kid Amy, I kid…but seriously can I come over? Please? If you don't want to hang out with me, I can take John to the park or something. Whatever! I'll do whatever….puuuhlllease"_

_"__Sorry, John's not here. He's out with my dad"_

_"__OMG even better! We're going out"_

_"__What? No Ben…it's late"_

_"__Says the single mom. It's not even 9 yet"_

_"__I don't know"_

_"__Come on Amy. If your first grader is out partying later than you, you know there's a problem"_

_"__Oh my god Ben. Alright fine. What do you want to do?"_

_"__Who cares, we'll figure it out. I'll pick you up. Get ready, be there in 20"_

_"__Oh god Amy noo, don't do it…save yourself"_ She heard Chloe yell in the background.

Ben must have thrown something at her just then, because she heard a soft thump followed by an OW.

Less than an hour later Ben had dragged her into some new bar downtown.

_"__Should we really be at a bar right now? I thought you quit drinking." _

"_I quit being an alcoholic Amy, there's a difference. I can have a beer or two here and there"_

_"__Can you?"_ Amy eyed him suspiciously.

Ben laughed. _"Yes Amy. I have been functioning as a perfectly normal social drinker for the past few years now. Those dark times of my teenager years are way past me_"

Amy followed Ben to the bar. As a reflex, Ben placed a hand on Amy's back to help steer her through the crowd.

"_Amy! Ben!"_ Someone shouted from across the bar.

They both turned towards the person calling out to them. It was Ricky and he with Adrian, along with a group of other people. Ben grinned when he saw the two familiar faces.

"_Sweet. Ricky and Adrian are here. And it looks like they're with a fun crowd. This night is turning out better than I thought"_

_"__Ben wait"_ Amy tried to protest, but Ben was already steering her towards their party.

Ricky looked like he's already downed a few beers. Adrian gave them a meek hi, she was sitting beside Ricky at the booth that was crowded with people. The game had just let out and the crowd had dragged themselves to the bar afterwards near the Arena.

Ben moved his hand from Amy's backed and looped it casually around her shoulders. For reasons unbeknownst to him, Ricky felt a knot in his stomach seeing Ben with his arms practically wrapped around Amy. To Ben, however it was a simple act of friendship. To Ricky, it meant a whole different thing.

Ricky snapped himself out of it enough to introduce them both to the crowd of people at their booth. Lifting himself off his seat a little, he pointed to some other people to the booth next to them and called out some names. A few people raised their hand as a form of acknowledgement.

_"__These are the guys on my team"_ Ricky said, nodding. "_And guest_" indicating to the female company that was with the group.

"_Oh wow, so it seems congratulations are in order_!" Amy grinned "_I heard you guys landed a pretty major account"_

A guy sitting on the opposite side of Ricky and Adrian, picked up his drink and pointed it towards Ricky. He had his arm looped around a blonde girl, whose name Amy didn't catch.

"_This guy right here!"_ he said then leaning forward, giving him a few affectionate slaps on the shoulder _"this guy right here is DUH MAN!" _

The rest of the guys with him cheered and raised their glass. It appears that this was not the first round this group has had that night, and they were already pretty rowdy. A guys who was sitting inside the same booth as Ricky and Adrian, reached over from behind Adrian to grab Ricky on the shoulder and started to shake him.

"Yeaaahhhhhh" He said, spilling some of his beer on the table.

"Alright guys, Alright enough" Ricky was wearing pretty big grin for a guy who was trying to be modest.

"_You should have seen this guy at that meeting man_" The guy with the blonde spoke again. "_The proposal - the pitch he was like fucking Brad Pitt in I don't know…any god damn movie he plays"_ He spat out before taking another chug off his beer.

Another round of laugher from the crowd. This time some other guys from the other booth chipped in.

_"__Damn I don't care if you were selling soap or what in there bro, the way you were going in that boardroom I would have bought my own spit from you"_

The crowd groaned at the reference. The guy beside the blond chucked a handful of nuts that were on the table his way.

Ricky raised his arms up, not noticing the glaring look coming from Adrian beside him. She had been feeling left out from Ricky and the rest of the group that night and now she was coming across some new information that was making her feel even crankier than she had been feeling that night. She was currently regretting making a choice to go out with Ricky and the rest of the group that night and was ready for the night to end.

_"__Okay, Okay. But I can't take all the credit. This girl here is responsible for editing the proposal_" Ricky pointed at Amy

The glare from Adrian, could have burn down a house had Ricky notice. But he was too busy jesting with the guys to see the look on Adrian's face.

"_Wait, it was you responsible for those edits?"_ blue shirt guy beside Adrian said, his squinting eyes growing wide.

Adrian was fuming internally.

"_Oh it was nothing_" Amy said with a nonchalant shrug.

"_Nothing? Listen, I've seen both the first and final draft…the final proposal is what sold it for sure_" Blue shirt guy was practically slurring his words.

"_HEY NOW! The first draft wasn't that bad…And I would argue the pitch had more to do with it_" Ricky yelled out defensively. He was practically screaming his words, a side effect of having too much alcohol in one night.

_"__Yeah, Yeah."_ At this point the interest of work died down and the crowd made room for Amy and Ben at one of the booths. Another round of drinks were ordered and it wasn't long before Amy and Ben were chatting animatedly with the members of the group. The guys Ricky worked with were friendly and easy to get along with. They cracked jokes about work and about made comments about other patrons at the bar. Again, not something they would usually engaged in, but sometimes alcohol made you act inappropriate or say things you would not otherwise say if one was not under the influence. Ben, who's had a few beers was having the time of his life and was really enjoying the company he was with.

"YOU GUY ARE AMAZING!" Ben yelled out, giving everyone at his booth a high five, after someone had cracked a joke they all found hilariously funny. The crowd just gave another cheer and clinked their beer glasses together.

"Ohhh there's dancing!" The blonde, whose name was Tina, exclaimed. The dim lighting was turned down even lower and a wall open up to reveal a stage with a DJ booth as the latest NE YO track begin to blast through the speakers.

Some members of the group went to dance as NE YO and Pittbull was telling everyone about 'having the time of their lives'. Those who didn't care for dancing stayed at the booth. Ben had met some brunette and was chatting her up at the bar. Amy found that she was having fun so she went with the group to dance for a bit, until suddenly she felt the dizziness coming on.

It lasted only seconds, but decided she needed some air. She lightly touched the arm of the new girl she met - Jacklyn, the girlfriend of one of the guys on Ricky's team. "_Hey I'll be back in a minute. I'm just going to get some air"_ Amy made a gesture as though fanning herself.

Jacklyn nodded. "_Want me to come with?" _

_"__No, no, you stay. I'll be right back"_

Ricky was still at the booth, but he noticed Amy rubbing her right temple with her right hand as she made her way out of the bar.

Concerned, Ricky excused himself and followed Amy.

The cool breeze hit Amy as soon as she stepped through the bar doors, and instantly she felt better. Taking a deep breath to breathe in the fresh air, she stepped away from the entrance and leaned back against the brick wall.

"_Amy_?" A voice called out to her moments later. She turned and saw Ricky

_"__You alright?"_ He asked, frowning as he stepped in front of her. Concern ridden all over his face.

"_Yeah, I think I just needed some air_" she smiled at him and Ricky stepped closer towards Amy, barely leaving any gap between them, trying to assess her condition.

"_Is the dizziness back?"_

_"__I mean a wave hit me in there, but it didn't last long"_

"_Oh, are you allowed to drink while on your medication?"_ Ricky knew he was being obtrusive, but he couldn't help being concerned.

"_Ricky_?" A voice called out from behind him.

"_Adrian_, _I was just making sure Amy was alright_" He subconsciously stepped back a little away from Amy, widening the gap between them.

"_Oh? What happened?"_ Adrian eyed Amy, raising an eyebrow. In her opinion she seemed perfectly fine.

"_It's nothing. It was nothing"_ Amy replied, feeling awkward that all the attention was focused on her.

"_Okay, but if you're feeling dizzy Amy maybe we should call it a night"_ Ricky said turning his attention back on Amy, still wearing the look of concern on his face.

"_Great idea, actually I came out here to tell you I'm ready to go home_" Adrian said to Ricky. "_I'll go find Ben so he can take Amy home"_

Amy was ready to go home, so she didn't argue.

"_I'll come with you, I should say bye to the guys. Amy would you be alright out here?"_

_"__I should say bye too, I told Jacklyn I'd be right back"_

"_That's okay, I can say bye the them for you. Just wait out here_" Ricky didn't want to drag her through the crowd of all those people. "_We won't be long_" he told her before walking through the doors after Adrian.

A few minutes later, Ben exited from the bar with Adrian and Ricky.

"_Hey everything cool_?" He asked looking at Amy. Knowing about her health condition also caused him to feel concern about Amy.

_"__Yeah Ben, I'm just tired"_

"_Alright well this night was fun_" Ben declared, as he shook hands with Ricky.

"_Yeah, great night"_ Ricky agreed, then turned to say bye to Amy "_Take care okay_?"

_"__Thanks Ricky you too, see you Adrian_"

Adrian simply nodded at Amy and Ricky. Her hands planted firmly on her hips, as she waited by the cab that was parked on the street. She was too furious at Ricky to give them a proper goodbye.


	22. Chapter 22

**Note: Sorry about the last chapter - just read through it and realized it was filled with heaps of mistakes! This is a bit of a 'filler' chapter - I am currently working on the next chapter and may upload it tonight if I get a chance. Thanks! **

Ricky paid the cab driver, while Adrian marched up to the front door and opened it without waiting for Ricky. As soon as he got in the house Adrian told him to come into the kitchen.

_"__I think we need to have the talk" _She leaned against the sink, her arms crossed.

_"__What? Now?"_ Ricky had way too much alcohol in his system to have this talk with Adrian. "_Can't it wait till tomorrow?"_

_"__No Ricky. You said we can have the talk when I wanted and I want to have the talk now"_

Ricky took off the sports jacket he was wearing and dropped in on the back of a chair. _"Fine"_ he said, taking a seat at the kitchen table.

Adrian was standing by the sink with her arms crossed, glaring at him.

_"__Do you mind telling me what that whole thing with Amy was about?"_

_"__What thing with Amy?"_

_"__She knew you landed the account" _

"Yes?"

_"__And you never told me?"_ Adrian said leaning forward as she glared at Ricky pressing a finger against her chest.

_"__You knew about Below Zero Adrian. It's all I've been working on this whole month" _he rationalized

_"__But you never told me you got it. That's big news and you shared it with Amy but you didn't share it with me!" _

_"__Oh GOD! It JUST happened! You weren't talking to me Adrian. What did you want me to do?"_ Ricky tried his best to keep calm. But it was late, and he was tired and he couldn't help feeling a little bit frustrated so he let his voice raise a little.

"_You had all night. We were at the hockey game, you guys were talking about it then, not once you thought, hmm guess what Adrian. Big news!"_

_"__EXACTLY! We were at the game! To be honest, it didn't occur to me to tell you about it Adrian"_

_"__But it occurred to you to tell Amy" _She said pointedly.

Ricky rubbed his face with both hands in frustration. "_Adrian….what are you really upset about here? You left, we weren't talking it wasn't like I purposely withheld information from you"_

_"__When did she help you work on the proposal?"_ Adrian crossed her arms again and looked at Ricky, ignoring his question.

"_What_?"

_"__You told Jake she edited the proposal. When?"_

"_Thurday night. The night before the pitch. She came to pick up John and she helped finalize it"_ Ricky stated simply.

_"__Wow, I don't believe this!" _She threw her hands in exasperation up in the air and paced along the counter.

"_What exactly did I do wrong Adrian? Tell me what are you upset about because right now I don't understand"_

Adrian shook her head. "_That's just it, Ricky you don't understand"_

"Okaayyy" Ricky was staring at her like she's suddenly grew two heads

_"__I was afraid…I mean I had a feeling, that when she came back, we might not be the same"_

"_Adrian for god sake, please start making some sense. You're upset because Amy helped me fix my proposal? It's what the girl does for a living! So sue me for wanting some help!"_

_"__Amy! Again with Amy, she's all you think about now!"_

_"__I wasn't the one who brought her up Adrian!"_

"_Yeah and when you're not chasing her to talk about John_" making air quotes at the last part "_you're checking up on her because you're worried she's not well. And now, I'm gone like what? A few days? And I find out you guys have all of a sudden become 'work buddies'?_

_"__Are you seriously kidding me right now?!"_ Ricky practically yelled, his eyes wide in disbelief. _"You're exaggerating everything way out of proportion"_

Adrian continued her rant "Y_ou can do ALL those things for Amy, but picking up your girlfriends phone calls when she's out of town? Oh nooo that's too much trouble for you" _

_"__Adrian. There wasn't a problem until you made it one. So I missed your calls for one day. It was ONE DAY Adrian! How often do I call you any other time?"_

_"__You just don't get it"_ Adrian spat and then glared at Ricky.

"_You're right I don't!"_ Ricky was lost his cool completely at this point. This time he was shouting. "_That's why I keep telling you, help me understand what you are upset about!" _Did he just not cancel on Amy last minute to try and make it work with her? And she's honestly telling him he doesn't think about her?

Adrian took a deep breath. All her energy was drained out of her.

"_I don't think this is going to work"_ Adrian said flatly. Her words came out emotionless. Devoid of any feeling.

Ricky looked up at her "_What's not going to work?"_

_"__US, Ricky…we're not working and I don't think we can fix it"_

Ricky had no fight in him left. He was tired. No he was exhausted. He literally did not have an ounce of energy left in him to continue with this conversation. How did a day that started so well, end up being this giant mess? All he knew was that he wanted this night to be over.

Not knowing what else to say, he simply asked, _"So now what?"_


	23. Chapter 23

Amy rang the doorbell to Ricky's house. If she was being perfectly honest, she was a little nervous as she stood waiting for the door to open. Apparently he and Adrian had gotten in a really big fight, but she also knew that they were trying to work things out. However, the few times she's had to come here in the past, Adrian always seemed to be at work or away. What she didn't know however, was that a second fight, even bigger than the first had taken place and that Adrian had stormed out of the house hours earlier, this time with no intention of every coming back.

Now Amy stood there, on the front porch unsure of what she would say had it been Adrian who answered the door. Luckily she didn't have to worry about that, as a grungy looking Ricky appeared in front of her, squinting as the bright sun hit his eyes. The 5 o'clock shadow making an appearance around his face.

_"__Wow you look terrible!"_ Amy said a little more at ease, now that she didn't have to worry about having an awkward encounter with Adrian.

Ricky let out an obvious sigh and scratched at his messy hair.

_"__I'm not sure if anyone has ever told you, but the word 'hello' is actually the appropriate word etiquette for greeting someone"_ Ricky had been in a terrible mood all night, but suddenly his mood lightened now that Amy had shown. He credited it to the fact that he hasn't seen John in a while and was happy to have him home again. He realized then that John wasn't with Amy.

_"__Where's John?"_

"_He's here, he just kicked his soccer ball by the backyard_" As if on cue, John came running out from the side of the house and headed straight to Ricky, dropping the ball again and letting it roll out of his hands.

"_Daddy_!"

Ricky bent down to pick John up, wrapping his arms tight. He didn't realize until then how much he needed that hug. His earlier problems suddenly melting away.

Amy brushed her bangs away, sweeping it towards the back of her head only to have it fall back in place exactly as it was before. _"Anyway what's your excuse this time? Or do you just make it a habit to walk around your house looking homeless_?"

Given the night that he had, this comment would have normally irritated Ricky. However, Ricky only let out a small chuckle still holding John.

"_Hey my house my rules_" he said smugly. If his hands were free, he would had held them out as if declaring himself king of the castle.

Amy characteristically responded by rolling her eyes and sweeping her bangs back again. She may have been much older, but she still carried the same attitude she had in high school.

"_Did you want to come in_?" Ricky offered making a gesture towards the house with his chin

Amy bit his lip. She wasn't sure if Adrian was in there. Hanging out at a bar with the two of them surrounded by other people was one thing, but seeing them together at their house was another.

"_No I actually have to go, maybe some other time_" she stammered, making an excuse.

Ricky tried to hide his disappointment. It would have been nice to have had some company for a while, after what he just went through with Adrian. Not that he wanted to talk with anyone about it, but he wouldn't have minded the company.

"_Okay well, I'll see you_" Ricky responded as casually as he could.

"_Right, well bye John"_ Amy leaned forward to give John a kiss, on the head. Ricky was still holding him so John had to lean away from Ricky to receive his mom's kiss. The fact that he was wearing his backpack made it even more awkward. Amy almost placed her hand on Ricky's shoulder to balance herself as she leaned in, but immediately stopped herself and cupped John's cheek instead, stepping forward with one foot to prevent herself from falling forward. "I'll see you soon"

"Bye mommy"

Amy turned and started heading towards her car. Ricky waited out on the porch with John, and watched her get into her car, waving out to her as she drove away.


	24. Chapter 24

Amy and John were cuddled together on Amy's couch playing a game on John's tablet. He was showing Amy how to build some sort of world he created. They both just had dinner and was waiting for Ricky to come by and pick him up. He had texted her earlier that day asking her if she could get John from school. He had a meeting with the Below Zero execs and wouldn't be able to make in time to get John. Amy was not only happy to get another day with her son, but she also didn't mind helping Ricky out.

A few minutes later she heard the buzzer go indicating that Ricky was downstairs, Amy let John open the door when Ricky knocked from the other side.

_"__Daddy!"_ Ricky scooped him up and threw him over his shoulders so that half of John's body was hanging down behind Ricky's back, causing John to giggle.

_"__Hey buddy. Sorry I couldn't get you at school today"_

"_That's ok, mommy and I had Kraft Dinner and I showed her how to make a village_" John said from behind Ricky still dangling over his dad's shoulders.

_"__Sounds fun_" then turned to Amy, "_Sorry - meeting ended late"_

_"__Yeah no worries, I was going suggest having him stay another night, and he still could of course, but I wouldn't be able to pick him up. I have an appointment tomorrow" _

_"__Oh what appointment?"_

"_Oh it's nothing"_ Amy shrugged her shoulders and tried to act nonchalant.

Ricky finally let go of John, who had gotten bored of the adult speak between his parents and absent-mindedly went back on the couch to continue playing his game, now that the attention has turned away from him.

"_With the neurologist?"_ Ricky knew he was prying but he couldn't help it. He had to ask.

Amy was silent, she was trying to think of a different excuse but couldn't come up with a believable one on the spot.

_"__Sorry, you don't have to answer that. It's none of my business" _He said quickly. He could tell he was making her uncomfortable.

Amy suddenly took note of Ricky's ragged appearance. "_Ricky, I know I was joking around before – but are you alright? I mean you do look like terrible, no offence_" The man looked like he hasn't slept in days.

Ricky chuckled and ran a hand through his already messy hair. _"Yeah, no – I uh, just have a lot of things going on"_

_"__Okay, well um I know you probably have to get going so I don't want to keep you. I'm sure Adrian is waiting for you"_

Ricky had no reason to lie so he simply told Amy that Adrian had left and has gone back to her dad's.

_"__We got into a big fight, the night before and we broke things off. It's over."_

"_I thought you guys were working things out?"_ She asked a little shocked at the news.

Ricky's legs grew tired of standing on the same spot, so he leaned against the door. Amy noticed and decided to finally just invite him in, feeling a tad guilty that she didn't just offer when he first arrived.

_"__I'm sorry, why don't you come in. I can make you some tea"_

_"__Tea would be great actually. I haven't had anything since lunch"_

_"__Oh, well we still have some KD if you want. I can heat some up for you. I know it's probably not the best…"_

_"__Right now I can eat anything" _He wasn't in the position to be picky.

_"__If you can wait a little longer, I can make you a tuna sandwich." _

Ricky didn't want to impose on her anymore that he already had. She's already done so much for him these last few days, when she really didn't need to. "_No Amy that's fine whatever you have is okay"_

A few minutes later, Ricky had a plate of KD and along with the tuna sandwich that Amy ended up making for him despite his protest.

"_Wanna talk about it?"_ Amy asked surprising herself. Adrian wasn't exactly her favourite person on earth, and up until a few days ago, neither was Ricky. And now here he was eating food she made for him in her apartment. Who would have thought?

_"__There's really not much to talk about. I think we've just grown apart, there's just nothing there anymore." _He shrugged, putting a spoonful of cheesy noodles in his mouth.

_ "__Oh" _Amy looked down at the counter and started sweeping her hand over it, as though she was brushing away some invisible crumbs that weren't there. She didn't know what to say to him, and it was an awkward conversation to be having with him.

After a moment Ricky finally broke the silence. _"This was really good Amy. Thanks for that" _referring to the meal he made for her. The plate was finished off completely clean. Not even a crumb was left.

Amy rolled her eyes. "_It was a sandwich and reheated KD"_ And just like that the awkwardness between them passed.

"_Well I really appreciate you feeding me"_ Ricky leaned back on the bar stool placing both hands on his stomach.

"_I think it would be unethical if I didn't."_ Amy attempted to joke, but she was genuinely concerned about him.

_"__I'm fine. It's just been a busy week"_ Ricky chuckled, trying to laugh it off. "_Well I should get going_" He got off the stool and started to head towards the living room.

Amy walked around the kitchen bar to follow him. "_Gosh, I didn't realize how late it's gotten. You sure about leaving John here? I can take him to school it's really no big deal"_

_"__Well I don't think we have a choice now"_ Ricky laughed noticing that John has fallen asleep on the couch.

"_Oh man we're terrible parents neglecting our only child like this_"

_"__Well since I'm dumping him with you again, I can at least get him ready for bed."_

_"__Oh geez Ricky, don't worry about it. It's late and you have to get up for work tomorrow - I don't, I'll take care of it"_

But Ricky was already heading towards John and lifting him up. "_It's fine Amy. It's the least I can do after everything you've done for me." _

"_Alright buddy, here we go_" Ricky said huffing as he lifted John off the couch.

Amy started to follow them into the room, but Ricky turned and stopped her, John in his arms.

_"__Seriously Amy, I got this"_ Ricky insisted, a determined look on his face.

"_But I like putting him to bed"_ Amy protested

Ricky almost laughed at Amy's almost pouted face. _"__I know and I will call you when he's ready, seriously"_ Ricky pointed his chin toward her as an attempt to shoo her away. John was getting heavier by the minute and he just didn't have the strength at the moment.

Amy gave up _"Alright fine_". She turned and headed towards the kitchen to clean the dishes still sitting in the sink.

Ricky finished tucking John into bed, at the same time Amy finished putting away the dishes.

_"__Alright he's all ready for kisses"_ Ricky said as he walked out of the John's room. "_Though I doubt he'll notice. He is out"_

Amy smiled and walked towards the front door with Ricky. They stood there for a few minutes not saying anything.

"_Well I better get going. I'll pick up John from school tomorrow"_

_"__Perfect, sounds goo…whoa"_

Amy felt the room spin around her. As a reflex, she shut her eyes and grasp at the nearest wall beside her as an attempt to steady herself.

This time Ricky went to her and held her by the sides of arms. "_Amy_?" He said so low, almost a whisper.

Like all the recent episodes she's been having, the dizziness passed almost as quickly as it came. _"I'm okay"_ she whispered. _"Just got a little dizzy for a moment" _

_"__Do you want me to stay_?" Ricky was still frowning, and kept his gaze on her. He was still standing in close proximity to her and had not yet dropped his hands from her arms.

Amy took a few deep breaths to recover, but after a minute she took a step back and told him she was fine.

_"__Are you sure? I mean will you be alright on your own?" _He asked quickly glancing towards John's room. Amy noticed the small gesture and she took it to mean that he didn't trust her alone with his son. He was probably thinking about the time he found her in the bathroom. If she was being honest, she didn't trust herself either. However, her pride got in the way of accepting his help.

So she simply said: "_Yes Ricky I'm fine. And the appointment I have tomorrow is with my neurologist_" She finally admitted to give him some piece of mind "_So hopefully all of this will get sorted out. I'm sure they just have to change my medication" _

Ricky on the other hand wasn't at all doubting Amy's competence to take care of John. The reason he glanced at John's room was because he felt guilty about burdening Amy with his responsibility, given the state she was in. It was his turn to be taking care of John and here he was letting Amy pick up the slack again, because he couldn't balance his life.

"_What time is your appointment?"_ He asked finally taking a few steps back away from Amy, giving her a little bit more space.

_"__In the afternoon, Why?"_

_"__I mean, I could take you"_

_"__No Ricky don't be silly. What about John?"_

_"__I can get my parents, or Nora to pick him up. It'll be fine"_

_"__Ricky, that's really nice of you to offer but you really don't have to"_

_"__Look Amy, I understand if this is something you don't want to share with me. Okay, I get it. But if I knew that you weren't feeling well, and I let you get in that car tomorrow and drive the half hour on the freeway it takes to get to that hospital, and something was to let's say happen to you on your way there; I would feel completely and utterly responsible. And everything in my conscience right now is telling me that I can't let you drive yourself, at least on your own. If not me then at least call George or Anne to take you"_

Amy sighed. It made sense, what Ricky was saying. He was right. The dizziness were coming back more and more frequent again and to go on her own tomorrow wouldn't be the smartest thing to do. She wondered which would be the lesser evil. Getting one of her parents to take her, and knowing them they would ask questions. They would probably insist on talking to the Doctor and be annoying and embarrassing about the whole thing. Or Ricky, who hasn't pushed her to talk about it once.

_"__Alright Ricky. Tomorrow, my appointment is at 3" _She said, once she made a decision.

_"__Thank you" He said pointedly "I'll be here a little before 2:30"_


	25. Chapter 25

**Authors Note: Thanks for your patience with this crazy long story. The wrap up is near hopefully...thanks for everyone who continues to follow this story :) **

Ricky waited outside the examining room the Dr. had led Amy to. He absently flipped through the magazine which he randomly picked up in his hand. He had offered to go in with her, to offer some support. He hated the idea of her going in there alone. Heck he hated thinking about all the times she's had to come here on her own. She refused of course, and he could do nothing but oblige to her request.

_"__Are you sure you don't want me to come with?"_ He had asked "_I'll just stand there in the corner, I won't say I word. It'll be like I wasn't even there at all"_

"_Then why come in?"_ she absent-mindedly replied, not looking up from the book she was reading.

_"__I don't know Amy, I guess it's because I worry"_ He didn't bother trying to come up with a lame excuse. Honesty had served him well so far.

Finally she looked up "_That's sweet Ricky"_ she sighed _"I appreciate you worrying, but – I'm not yours to worry about. I can handle this"_. She wasn't trying to be ungrateful or hurtful. She said it with sincerity.

The car ride home was silent. Neither of them wanting to initiate conversation. However, it wasn't a weird kind of silence. It was nice. Maybe the rain had something to do with. It was raining out. The sky was overcast and the roads were sleek.

Ricky had ended up staying the night, despite further protest from Amy. Luckily Amy's living room couch was a pull out so that would have a real bed to sleep in. Amy had woken up nauseous in the middle of the night and was up at 2 in the morning throwing up. She had forgotten to take her meds during dinner time, so she ended up having to take it before bed and hadn't taken any food with it. Ricky had heard her get up had stood at the door which she didn't close out of habit.

_"__Hey you alright?"_ He had asked concerned.

_"__It's okay Ricky you don't need to see this, my stomach just couldn't handle the meds" _She walked away from the sink ready to close the door, but Ricky had stopped her.

_"__Please…let me help you"_ He had said holding the edge of the door.

Seconds later she was back over the sink throwing up nothing but liquid, and Ricky had stood right behind her rubbing her back and holding her hair away from her neck. After, Ricky had taken her too bed and came back with a glass of warm water, before retreating back to the pull out in the living room. She had woken up before he did though, but she woke unusually early. Knowing he's had a rough week, she moved quietly around the apartment getting breakfast ready, trying not to wake him before he needed to. At 7:30 she woke John up and got him ready for bed and at ten to 8, Ricky had still not woken up.

_"__Daddy's here?"_ John said surprised when he saw his dad sleeping in the living room.

_"__Yes, you both were super tired last night you both just fell asleep_!" Amy chuckled in hushed tones. "_Maybe you should wake him up for work now though_" She grinned.

John climbed or rather bounced on the couch waking Amy. _"Morning buddy_", he said gruffly as he pulled John's head in towards him for a kiss, then up at her _"Morning_" he smiled.

Her heart almost melted at the sight of the two of them in early morning in bed. "There's coffee and pancakes" She had replied.

_"__There's something about the rain that makes it nice to think_" Amy had said out loud looking out the window.

Ricky said nothing. He quickly gave her a quick glance as she continued to stare out the window. What are you thinking about Amy?' he had wanted to ask.

Amy was thinking how nice this was. Having someone there for her when she wasn't feeling well. Ricky picking her up after work to take her to her Doctor's appointment. She never looked forward to those. Who would? It was just more test. More test that didn't get them any closer to finding out what was wrong with her. She was tired of going through what she's been going through. She just wanted it to stop. Or at least have a concrete diagnosis. At first she feared the worst, but now she didn't care what it was. She just wanted to know WHAT was wrong with her. She decided that the worst case scenario was better than not knowing anything. It was nice for Ricky to stay with her the whole time. These appointments weren't quick, stop in and get out. She assumed he would have just dropped her off and then picked her up when she was ready. But he stayed in the waiting room the whole time. He insisted on coming in with her. And at first, she thought about it. It would have been nice to go through this with someone together. To have someone to discuss this whole thing with, whatever this thing was about. She was getting tired of keeping everything to herself. She knew her parents were dying to know. They try to bring it up. But talking about it with her parents was more exhausting that dealing with it on her own. She thought back to a conversation she had with the three of them, after the whole hospital incident thing happen.

_"__How could they still not know anything_?" Her mother had said looking frustrated _"I mean if it's been happening for a year! This is ridiculous" _

_"__Have you thought about switching Doctors? This one obviously is unable to help you"_ That was George

_"__Oh honey, we'll get to the bottom of this. I can make some calls. Hey George, you remember Debbie? She had similar symptoms, turned out she had a brain tumor and they didn't catch it until it was too late. If they had caught it sooner – not that I think that's the case here honey, but oh honestly they're obviously not trying hard enough_" That was Anne

By the end of the dinner, Amy was more than annoyed. It was like they were talking ABOUT her, rather than TO her while she sat there right beside them in the same room.

But she thought about how she could share these things with Ricky. He wouldn't be pushy, she didn't think. He didn't push her about going into the room with her. He would just listen, while she talked. And all he would tell her was that everything will be okay, no matter what happens. And that would be all she needed to feel at ease. If that had been Anne at the hospital with her, she wouldn't have a choice. Anne would play the 'mom' card and would have insisted she be in there with her daughter.

She appreciated Ricky for that. For simply – just being there. But he was Ricky and she was Amy, and too much has happened between them for her to let him in so easily. She couldn't let herself get use to this. Things had always been rocky between them. Sure, he was here today, but tomorrow could be an entirely different story. Previous experience had shown her that once you think your life was heading in a sure direction, you get a curveball thrown your way – or however that saying goes. The thing with Adrian and the hockey night was simple proof of that. Fool me once, she thought.

So that's why by the time they had pulled up in front of her apartment, she decided to not give in to this growing need she had of sharing this burden with someone. She would continue to deal with this on her own. It's not like there was anything to deal with at the moment anyway. They still had no idea what was wrong with her. So until then, she would continue pushing forward as normal.

Ricky had put the car into park and taken of his seatbelt. By the time she had gathered her things from the foot of his car and had released herself from her seatbelt, he had already gone around to open the door for her.

_"__Here I can get those" _He said reaching for her bag.

_"__Its fine Ricky, you don't have to come up"_

_"__Amy, I can walk you up to your apartment. It's not a big deal"_

_"__Really it's okay. I've already troubled you enough today as it is"_

Ricky didn't budge. He just gave her a stern look and simply said_ "Amy"_

_"__Okay fine"_ She gave in and let go of her bag to let Ricky take it, and let Ricky walk her up to her apartment.


	26. Chapter 26

**Ricky**

At work the next day Ricky again was useless at his attempt to get any work done. He was trying to put together a concept board for the commercial they needed to shoot for the Below Zero account. However, he was spending half his time staring at the unfinished images on the screen rather than doing anything to them. He thought about texting Amy, just to check in and see if she was alright. Then he figured that was a stupid idea, since it wasn't like they were together or anything and he didn't want to upset or confuse her. For some reason he found himself wondering about when she would hear back with the results. He didn't understand how she could be so calm about this whole thing. Seems like he was more anxious about this than she was.

_"__Who's the girl?" A _voice interrupted his thoughts_._ Ricky looked up and Jake was standing by the door with a smirk on his face.

_"__What girl?" _he asked as he turned his gaze back to his computer screen. He had no desire to engage in any conversation with Jake about 'a girl'.

Jake took a seat on the small couch Ricky had in his office, grabbing the nerf ball on the table they used to help them get through brainstorming sessions. He started tossing it up in the air and catching it. He did this repeatedly.

_"__The girl that's going to screw this project from finishing by deadline"_

Ricky shook his head and tried to put on a blank look_ "no clue what you're talking about". _

"_Ohhh god come on man. You've been coming in to work every day, but it's like you might as well not even show up. God knows where your heads been because it hasn't been in here. You haven't done a single thing to that board, when we all know you would have walked in like what - the day after the exec meeting with at least 3 different drafts, had you not been moping around the office like some dweeb. I thought this thing was your baby"_

_"__It is"_

_"__So then I ask again, who's the girl?"_

_"__Why are you assuming it's a girl?"_

_"__What else would cause your focus to steer away from this project? I can't think of any other good reason my friend"_

"_Why don't you ask Brett, he seems to think I'm moping about the loss of my last relationship_" Ricky said, trying to get Jake off his back. By this time, word had gotten around that Ricky and Adrian had broken up. Brett had come into his office a few days ago bugging him about it, not unlike what Jake was doing now trying to tell him what he 'needed was to sneak off into the bar across the street and grab a few beers for lunch'.

_"__I've seen you after you've fought with Adrian. And this is different. So I'm going to ask again. Do I know her?"_

"_Okay there Dr. Phil. You are eerily observant, that is some stalker shit right there"_ Ricky leaned back on his leather chair, but continued to look at the screen rather than Jake who has now taken a very comfortable position of lying down on his office couch. But his brain was working a million miles an hour and to both of their surprise, Ricky began rambling.

_"__There is no girl Jake. I mean theoretically speaking there MIGHT have been the idea of this girl, but well I don't know. It's a long story"_

"_Sooooo you've know her for a while?"_ Jake tossed the nerf ball to Ricky who caught it.

_"__Ohhh Yeah. And me and this girl? Been there, done that. And it was a colossal mess. It's never going to work between us. So these feelings are completely irrelevant_" He tossed the ball back, then continued on his rant. _"I mean if you knew this girl, she's…god – she's absolutely impossible. She has this way of just getting really under your skin. It's almost like she has to have an opinion on everything you know? Worse than any diva client you can imagine_"

_"__No one could be worse than the Crafts people" _

Ricky chuckled "_They were the devil_" he agreed. "_I was ready to rip up their contract and tell them to go find someone else" _

"_So she's high maintenance_" Jake raised an eyebrow and looked at Ricky continuing his interrogation, then tossing the ball again his way. This time Ricky held on to it and began passing it from hand to another.

_"__No not in the way you think. She's not shallow or materialistic. She just has to have an opinion on everything" _

_"__Annoying?"_

"_Weeeelll I wouldn't put it like that per se. She's like your conscience, but worst because you can't actually ignore it when you want to. She's always right there making you choose over right and wrong. And she has this complex, this need to fix all things wrong with the world, even when you don't always want her to._ He thought back to the time in high school, where he almost didn't get into college because the advisor had accused him of wanting to sleep with her. Leave it to Amy to stubbornly go marching up to the right people and fixing the whole mess for him, even though he told her repeatedly to leave it alone. He didn't think he ever told her just how grateful he was for that. 

_"__Like yourself?" _Jake said with smirk.

Ricky ignored him, but continued to talk. 

_This girl is smart Jake, she's brilliant - and driven. God is she driven. It's like she gets something in her head and then it's just done. And not like mediocre okay I did it kind of way. In like a - you're inspired to be better because of what she did way"_. He's mind raced back to all those things she's done, like going to New York as part of some teen mom music program and mentoring other girls, or getting into Hudson and becoming this amazing talented journalist. He wondered about all the other things she could have done with her life, had she not met him that one summer…

_"__Huh, you lost me after mediocre" _

_"__How many people say they're going to go to college, but then coast through the whole thing – possibly constantly hung over and drunk through it all - and still get a diploma in the end? This girl goes to college and graduates 3__rd__in her class" _This girl becomes a mom at 16 and then goes off to inspire other young moms, he thought, she couldn't even do teen pregnancy like the other girls who gets knocked up in high school.

Jake whistled "_I don't even think I finished in the top 95 and I'm pretty sure there was only like 100 people in my program. That's a little intimidating…also I'm definitely the former in that scenario" _He winked

_"__Don't I know it" _Ricky said chuckling

_"__She hot?"_

Ricky smiled and this time actually looked at Jake. "_Gorgeous. She's the girl next door kinda pretty. The kind of pretty that literally takes your breath away" _He stopped fiddling with the ball and tossed it back to Jake.

_"__Takes your breath away? Wow that's original"_

Ricky laughed "_I swear man, the first time I saw her I'm pretty sure I actually stopped breathing" _And she still had that same effect on him, even now. He thought about the time she first showed up at his door to drop of John.

_"__Alright, so you're in love with an imaginary person"_

_"__What?"_

_"__Come on. You're saying not only is she crazy smart, and walks around like she's some kind of Mother Theresa, but now she's also supposedly super gorgeous? Either you're making up some girl, in which case I've just wasted the last 15 minutes hearing about your crazy fantasy - so ewww by the way…or you idolize this one person so much you're making her bigger than life"_

Ricky couldn't help but laugh. "_Oh she's very real alright"_

It suddenly dawned on Jake who Ricky was talking about, and it showed in his facial expression. _"WAIT, SHUT YOUR DAMN MOUTH! I know who she is! She's that girl from the bar isn't she? The one who edited the proposal?"_

Instead of saying anything, Ricky just tossed his head back on his chair and stared at the ceiling.

_"__Holy shit she is! What's your problem bro, don't be lame, make your move man!"_

_"__It's not that simple"_

_"__Right because nothing in your life is" _Jake retorted sarcastically

_"__She's John's mother Jake_" Ricky finally admitted, sighing in defeat.

_"__I'm sorry come again?"_

_"__Amy, she's John's mother"_ Ricky repeated staring into space

There was a moment of silence as a shocked Jake took this new information in and then he howled in laughter as though it was the funniest thing he's heard all day. "_AND the plot thickens…dun dun dun! Yo that girl is way too hot to have a kid"_

Ricky automatically glared at him "_Watch it"_

_"__Chill bro. I'm not after your girl, I'm here telling you to go get em. Also didn't' she like leave you on your wedding day?!" _

_"__First she's not my girl and second don't YOU have work to do?"_ Ricky was over people accusing him of being unproductive when they were slacking off just as much. At least he wasn't going around to people's office bugging the crap out of them. And he certainly was not going to address Jakes last comment, despite how inaccurate it was.

_"__You know…you miss 100 percent of the shots you don't take"_ Jake said throwing the nerf ball right at Ricky's head intentionally hitting him on the side of his face, before walking out of his office.

Ricky just shook his head as he threw the ball after him hitting him on the back. It landed on the floor and was kicked to the side by another person walking by. That was the problem with working with such a young group of guys. Going in to work every day felt more like walking into a frat house. But he wouldn't have traded it for anything.


	27. Chapter 27

**Amy**

Amy was also failing to get any work done. She's been staring at her computer for the past hour and half and had written down 3 sentences. She wasn't even sure what she was trying to write about. These days it was hard to get inspired to write. There were so many things going on and it was making it hard to focus. However she also knew that inspired or not, she needed to get some article going because it's been a while since she's picked up a pay check and her bank account is starting to wind down to an alarming number.

She took a deep breath, blew her hair off her face then just began to type furiously with no intended purpose. She tried not to let her thinking interfere with her typing. _'Okay here we go...stream of consciousness exercise'_.

**_Dear 16 Year Old Me:_**

**_Hi. How are you? I'm you, from the future. I'm writing you this letter because well, right now I'm supposed to be working but I can't think. So la la la la la la la la la la….okay anyways back to this letter. So right now…let's see, yes this time right now you've just turned 16 and you have a baby growing in your tummy. I know you're scared. I've been there. HA! Okay all kidding aside. I just want to let you know that everything is going to be okay. Okay that is a lie. Everything may not work out exactly like you dreamed it to be. Well, now that I think about it, in a way it does. Let me explain myself better. _**

**_Right now you're thinking about giving the baby up for adoption. You're thinking, what do I know about taking care of this baby? Don't worry 16 year old Amy. You'll figure it out and it will come to you almost as naturally as breathing. When you do finally decide to keep him, it's going to be hard and confusing and you're going to go through a roller coaster of emotions. But I also want you to know that, everything you're going through right now and everything you're about to go through in the next few months and the first few years of his life will _****_all be worth it._******

**_You're going to name him John. Well actually Ashley is going to name him John. No No this isn't a joke. You let Ashley name your son. I think. Or maybe she was just the only one with you when you decided on a name. My memory is a little fuzzy. Anyways...believe me when I tell you – he is the most beautiful boy in the whole entire universe. His cuddles are just the sweetest. His laugh is contagious and his energy….is exhausting. But you love that about him, how he's always energetic and cheerful because it's what assures you that he is happy. _**

**_His smile is just like his dad's. It's halfway between a smirk and a grin. Just picture it, but on a little boy with your eyes and his hair. Gorgeous right? I wish you could see him now. Just so you know what you can look forward to. Just so you don't have to cry yourself to sleep anymore because you will finally know that keeping him is the absolutely best decision you will ever make in your life. Every other decision you make from that point on might be murky and debatable. But not this dear teenager – this is better than a sure thing. Just like you know the sun will always rise each and every day, you know that you were meant to keep that little boy growing inside you. So don't fret. Please don't fret. _**

**_Ricky – he's still in your life. For the next 8 years and who knows how much longer because I don't know the future, he will be in and out of your life several times. You know that confused feeling you have towards him right now? You're not sure whether you want to drag his lifeless body into the nearest pond (okay a little graphic) or just drag him into the nearest corner and kiss the bejesus out of him until you're gasping for air? That feeling never goes away. One day you'd rather die than have to deal with his irritating self, one more day; the next you're thinking about the last time he's brushed your hair away from your face or when he opened the car door for you, or when he offered to hold your hand at your doctor's appointment because you told him you were scared. And sometimes you allow yourself remember about the times he's offered you his shoulder when the world seems like it's collapsing all around you, or the way he looks at you when…_**

Amy stopped writing just then. She buried her face in her hands in frustration before pressing down hard on the backspace button. She watched as the letters disappear quickly on the screen. She continued to hold the back button down until the page was blank again.

Alright she seriously needed to stop fooling around and get some work done. She grabbed her coat and decided to grab a coffee and go for a walk. Maybe she'll find her inspiration at the park.


	28. Chapter 28

**Author's Note: REPOST! So I just re read this chapter again and realized it was absolutely terrible! I had to re write it. I didn't bother re reading it before posting. My bad. I guess consider it as peek into the unedited version. lol. Still working on getting the final chapter up soon :) **

"_Pathetic Man, I see you're still there being absolutely useless_" This time it was Brett who popped by his office.

Ricky looked up from his computer screen. He realized that he has been sitting there staring into space, as he tossed the nerf ball from one hand to the other.

_"Shut up. I just have a lot on my mind right now" _He threw the ball at Brett who made no attempt to catch it. He was over this 'bug the crap out of Ricky' act.

_"Obviously the ad spread isn't one of them" _

_"What do you want Brett" _Ricky asked now a bit annoyed as he picked up a pen and started twirling it around his fingers.

_"Chill Mr. Grumpy. I was just stopping by the bid you adieu. I'm heading out a bit early to go to the car meet." _

"_Wait…what did you say?"_

_"Uh the meet?" _He made a face as if to say 'duh?'.

Twice a year Glen Valley held a festival on a small island which was only accessible by a ferry. It started out as a small event which featured live local bands and local food vendors. They also had old school carnival games, like winning a gold fish by getting a penny in a fish bowl, or popping a balloon pinned to a wall for a prize. 5 years ago they started bringing in import cars and each year it has gotten bigger and bigger. Last year a reporter had used a scene from the movie fast and furious to describe how crazy that event had gotten. Which was why some people, particularly the guys who go there just for the car show has begun to refer to it as the car meet.

_"You're a genius man"_ Ricky said checking his watch and logging off his computer. He figured this could be his opportunity to make it up to Amy. Hopefully he can find someone to watch John for a couple of hours.

Brett however just stood there looking confused "_Um thank you? And also did the fire alarm go off at the same time I've gone deaf? Where are you going in such a hurry all of a sudden?"_

As he was saying this, Ricky was already grabbing his coat and work bag and moving towards Brett ready to leave the office.

_"You know some idiot once told me you miss 100 percent of the chances you don't take"_ Ricky patted Brett on the shoulder as he walked around him.

"_Huh?!"_ He walked away leaving his confused colleague behind.

He called Amy as soon as he got in his car. He listened to it ring a few times before Amy picked up. "_Hey" _He said as soon as she picked up "I_ was just wondering, if you were free tonight. I needed your help with something and was wondering if it's okay for me to drop by" _Ricky figured that it was best not to tell Amy about his real plans. After the whole hockey night gong show, he knew he would stand a better chance of getting her to come out with him if he asked once he's gotten to her place.

Moments later, he picked John up from school and headed home to change and pack an overnight bag for John, in case he didn't get back at a decent time. He had called George on his way home and he agreed to look after John for the night.

Now, standing in front of her apartment; he took a deep breath and took a second to think about what he was going to say before knocking at her door.

"_Doors open_" Amy called from inside. Ricky opened the door and stepped in. Amy was nowhere in sight.

"Amy?"

She emerged from her bedroom wearing a pair of pajama pants and an oversize college Hudson sweatshirt. To Ricky this was just another sign that she didn't have any plans that would interfere with his own.

"_Hey Ricky…sorry I was just putting some laundry away, come in"_ she offered heading towards the couch.

_"Actually Amy we're not staying here"_

_"Oh did you want to go down to the coffee shop_?" Amy asked a bit confused. _"You should have told me I would have changed. What did you need help with anyway?__" _Amy had assumed when he called him earlier that he probably needed help with work again.

_"No actually um, I don't really need help with anything. I just wanted to make up for ditching you the other night. I was thinking we could go to the festival" _Ricky stood waiting awkwardly, he wasn't sure if he should sit or stay standing so he ended up staying where he was, as he waited for an answer

Amy just gave him a confused look. _"What?" _

_"So you know the festival on the island? I was thinking we could go. I mean I told you I would make it up to you after ditching you the night of the hockey game. I already dropped John off with your dad. I mean Robbie is there to this week so John is beside himself. He already had an overnight bag, not that I had planned for him to stay the night but when he saw Robbie there, he really wanted too...any ways, what I'm trying to say is, will you let me take you to the festival? _Ricky knew he was blubbering. If that had been a pitch, he would definitely have been fired over it. The consequences of being ill prepared. He knew he should have thought about what he was going to say.

_"Ricky, I told you it's fine" _

_"I know, but it's something I want to do. I would literally feel terrible for the rest of my life" _He was practically begging. Okay he was begging. He held his breath as he waited for a response.

Amy sighed. How could she say no? After all the trouble he's already gone through? And if she was being honest with herself, it wasn't like she had anything else going on that night any ways.

_"I mean…alright Ricky" _She found her self saying in defeat_ "Why not" _

_"Perfect. We're taking the ferry, the next one leaves in the next hour, so we should try to get going if we want to catch it"_

_"Alright just give me a few minutes then" _She said as she turned towards her room. She came back out a few minutes later in a pair of jeans and a white shirt.

Amy and Ricky stared out into the water in silence as they stood on the ferry that was taking them to the island. The ferry was packed which made it almost impossible to move. Together to stood holding on the railing as they saw the island get closer and closer. They can already see all the lights and hear the loud music booming from the festival. Finally the ferry docked and a loud horn sounded signalling that they were able to exit the boat.

"_Alright lets go"_ Ricky nodded his head to Amy and turned towards the exit as he led their way out of the ferry.

Amy tried to stay close behind Ricky, but the crowd made it difficult to do so. She was getting pushed and bumped left, right and centre. A few people got in between her and Ricky and a slight nervous feeling went through her at the thought of them getting separated in this crowd. She was about to call out to him when he looked back, noticing that she wasn't exactly right behind him. It took a second for him to stop and reach out to her. He found her hand through the people and took a strong firm grip on it, and just like that she was right behind him again. It was so crowded that her shoulder was pressed against his back, as he held her hand.

Amy felt Ricky's big warm hands tightly wrap around hers, as he pulled her through the crowd. The strong hold he had around her small hands, gave her a feeling of safety; she felt then as though she would let him lead her anywhere. Heck she would blindly follow him into the water, with the kind of grasp he had on her.

Finally as they got a little farther away from the boat the crowd thinned out a little and Ricky was able to position himself behind Amy, letting go of her hand and placing it on her back instead.

"_You alright?"_ he asked from behind her, leaning his head close to her ear so she could hear him over the buzz of the crowd and the loud music blaring in the background.

"_Yeah I'm good_" She nodded, giving him a small smile.

_"Let's go hit the food truck first_" He said, dropping his hand to hold hers again then led her through towards the festival.

An hour later, they were walking towards the grass area to watch the 10:00 firework show. Ricky was carrying a massive stuffed lion he had won at one of the games. _"You think John would be jealous if you went home with a prize and he didn't get anything?"_ He joked.

"_Well lets not risk it then. We'll let him have this one"_ Amy laughed. It was a real light hearted laugh. She realized it's been a while since she's laughed so easily like that.

"_Should we try and win him a gold fish?"_ He asked as they walked by the goldfish game.

"No way" Amy said shaking her head "_Tomorrow that thing will be dead and I'm going to have to go find an exact looking goldfish without him knowing which would probably go on indefinitely until I'm finally comfortable telling him about the circle of life_"

Ricky laughed and gave her a look _"Intense much?" _ He had said as they passed by the fish booth.

Ricky had found them the perfect spot on the grassy lawn. Amy was about to sit down.

_"Ah Ah Ah"_ Ricky said, telling her to hang on. He opened the backpack that he had been carrying with him, and took out a blanket for them to sit down on.

_"There now you can sit" _He said offering her a spot of the blanket.

Amy smiled and simply shoot her head as she sat down._ "__Wow, I was wondering what was up with the backpack"_

She put the deep fried onion rings she's been holding down beside her, which she was sharing with Ricky. Ricky had insisted they tried something from every food truck. Amy of course tried to protest, especially after the that massive poutine they had shared telling him her stomach was going to burst if she ate one bite of anything else. Ricky just told her that going to a festival and not trying everything was simply a sin.

Ricky took a seat beside her and cool breeze went through forcing her to tuck her hands inside the sleeves of the sweater she had brought with her. She pulled her knees up so they were touching her chest and hugged them as she looked up at the sky, waiting for the show to start.

Ricky took out a smaller thicker blanket. "_Here"_ he said, as he wrapped it around her shoulders _"I figured this time I would be prepared"_ He grinned.

Amy said nothing and just looked at him.

"_What?"_ Ricky finally said after a moment, feeling a bit uncomfortable with the look Amy was giving him.

_"__Nothing"_ she shook her head and looked down smiling, before looking back up at him again "I just...well t_his is nice Ricky. I'm glad we went here tonight. Thank you" _

_"Oh good, I take it that means you're having fun?__"_ he asked, leaning in towards her a little.

_"__Yeah. I'm having a lot of fun_" she replied still smiling. Her heart was suddenly beating really fast. This time it was Ricky's gaze on her that made her feel a bit unease.

She was so beautiful, with hair up in a pony tail and her bangs framing her face, which was being blown gently by the wind. Ricky couldn't help himself then. He leaned in closer and went for a kiss. His lips made contact with Amy's at the exact same time the first firework went off in the night sky.


	29. Chapter 29

Amy was overcome with shock as she felt Ricky's lips onto hers. She let his lips explore hers for a few seconds, then her memory took over and she was suddenly transported to the girl she was in high school, and she allowed herself to kiss Ricky back.

Ricky began to lose himself in the kiss. Leaning forward, he placed one hand behind her head, and the other was on the blanket to keep himself from falling forward into her. He deepened the kiss, almost forgetting that they were in a public place and there was a crowd around them.

Amy's self-consciousness however, took over and instantly she was back in the present - to what was real. And what was real now is that Ricky and her had broken up. The love they felt for each other all those years ago wasn't real. The last big fight they had where she left for four years right after – **that** was very real. So that could only mean that whatever feelings she had going on inside her right now, this kiss they shared because they allowed themselves to get lost in the moment - was not.

_"__Ricky…don't_" she whispered using her hands, pushing at his chest a little.

Ricky stopped right away, and pulled back, immediately releasing her.

_"__Sorry…"_ he said looking frazzled and a little out of breath _"I…I'm not sure what got into me"_

The rest of the night was spent almost in silence. Such few words were exchanged between them, it was as if they had to pay for every word they spoke out loud. The whole time, Ricky wondered if he what he did was wrong while Amy contemplated how she could have been so stupid to fall into this trap all over again.

It wasn't until they got back to Amy's apartment that Ricky had finally spoke about the incident.

_"__Listen about tonight…"_ He started, after following Amy through the door of her apartment.

_"__Ricky, it's nothing. It was a mistake"_ She said turning around

Ricky felt as though someone had just punched him in the stomach. A mistake?

"_Yeah right. One that won't happen again"_ he gave a nervous chuckle, hoping his face didn't reveal how he really felt at the moment.

_"__Okay good"_ Amy whispered, looking down at her feet.

_"__So…um well I guess I better go get John then" _

"_Oh right…well, let him know I said goodnight_" She said, tracing some invisible pattern on the floor with her feet.

Ricky turned around and was about to put his hand on the door knob before spinning back around to face Amy, now with flustered look on his face.

"_Do you really believe that Amy_?" he asked, sounding a bit frustrated

She stopped moving her foot and looked up frowning in confusion.

_"__That it was a mistake? Do you really believe that this day had been a mistake? Because if you were to ask me I don't think there was anything wrong with it at all."_

_"__I'm not saying this day was a mistake Ricky. I told you, I was having fun. I just…well I just don't think it should have ended the way it did. I want to be friends with you Ricky"_

Ricky's jaw dropped "_Are you seriously putting me in the friend zone_?" he asked incredulous. How could he have read this night all wrong? She had wanted to kiss him too right? He was pretty sure he felt a moment between them, which was the only reason he decided to go for it in the first place.

_"__What's wrong with being friends?" _

_"__Nothing, there is nothing wrong with being friends. Friends are great!"_ His said, his voice rising.

_"__So then what are you upset about?"_

_"__I…actually never mind, you know what you're right forget it. It was a mistake" _

_"__No tell me Ricky, you were going to say something else. What were you going to say?"_

_"__I just"_ Heck what else did he have to lose? After getting rejected and being put in the friend zone, there's no point of holding back "_You know… I don't think I've ever gotten over you. I've tried to move on, I've tried to ignore it and eventually I think I may have succeeded in pushing my feelings away. With you being away, it was – easier. But then you had to come back, what with that new hair and those new clothes…"_

_"__My hair?" _She asked incredulously, she lowered herself so she was half sat, half stood against the top of the arm of the couch in the living room. Now she was officially confused. What did her hair and clothes have to do with anything? She heard Ricky continue so she didn't say anything.

_ "…__after that day with John at the circus, I just – I couldn't ignore it anymore. I just thought, god this is so stupid, I don't know I just thought that after tonight that you felt something too"_

Amy was about to say something but then she was suddenly overcome with emotions. Instead, tears started to fill her eyes and she looked up trying to hold them back.

Ricky noticed tears had form on Amy's face. Instead of concern, he felt frustrated. What the hell was she upset about? Here he was making himself completely vulnerable, making himself look like a fool after she had clearly rejected him, and she has the audacity to be the one upset?

"_God Ricky…I can't do this again with you"_ She said almost screaming.

_"__Right. I know that now Amy. You've made that very clear"_ He replied, his tone flat.

_"__I tried you know"_ she said quietly, _"I thought I could try and just accept and understand, but I just can't be that girl anymore"_

Okay, now Ricky was confused. What the heck was Amy talking about?

_"__What girl Amy? What are you talking about?"_

_"__Ricky, I tried to understand you, I did. When I found out about your past and why it was so hard for you to be committed, I thought okay, maybe I could accept that. I knew how hard it was to just be with me and only me, when I agreed to be with you. I tried giving you space. I tried to not take it personally every time you walked away in the middle of an argument. I tried not to worry when you didn't come back for hours, never telling me where you went. I told myself that that was who you are and that even though it killed me each time, as long as you came back then we would be okay"_

Ricky's body sank forcing him to lean again the wall as he absorbed what Amy was telling him.

Amy's voice wavered as she continued to speak. Almost a bit embarrassed about admitting what she was about to say.

_"__I don't know Ricky_" she signed "_I just want to be with somebody, who wanted me just as desperately as I wanted them. I know this is probably going to sound stupid and girly, but I want to feel like I'm with someone who was crazy about me, not like they had to keep their side of some verbal contract. I was tired of feeling like I could never compete with girls like Adrian, or Clementine or whatever other hot girl who threw themselves at you. And then I finally realize that I didn't' want to spend my whole life feeling threatened by those girls. I don't want to feel sick to my stomach every time you got a text message or a phone call. I was tired of wondering if you might be running off to some other girl every time we got into a fight. And I hated myself, for being so jealous and insecure and not being able to trust you. I love you Ricky, you have to know that, that I love you, and the hardest part was letting you go. So that you finally didn't' feel burden to stay with the girl who was stupid enough to get herself pregnant at 15"_

Ricky, who had been just listening to Amy's confession almost felt sick to his stomach.

_"__That's how I made you feel?"_

Amy said nothing, just buried her face into her hands not able to look at Ricky

Ricky moved in front of Amy and knelt down in front of her, placing his hands beside each knee.

_"__Amy if there was anyone who should have felt threatened it was me" _

He took a minute to gather his thoughts before he spoke again.

_"__I was so young Amy, and stupid and immature. I felt like I didn't deserve you and I didn't know how to deal with it. You were so smart and beautiful, and innocent and I was this scum bug who slept around because it was the one thing that made feel in control of my life."_

_"__Ricky you were hardly a scum bug" _Amy said, dropping her hands to her side and looking to face Ricky_. _

_"__I was just so starved for love and attention I thought I could get by going after all these girls. And getting them was so easy. It made me feel like I had power over my life. I sought out what I wanted and always got what I want"_

_"__Ricky, I know. I told you I get it, but like I said…"_

_"__Amy I have never felt vulnerable with any girl until I met you. You scared me."_

Amy wasn't expecting that. She looked at Ricky with a curious expression.

_"__You were scared of me?"_

_"__I knew I was already in deep when I first met you. But then after I had gotten to know you and when I found out you were having my child, I just started thinking about the kind of life we could have together. And that scared the shit out of me"_

"Why?"

_"__Because maybe you wouldn't want that. You started dating Ben and you didn't exactly made me feel like you wanted me. And Ben was this guy who came from a family with money. I'm sure whatever you needed, whatever you wanted – he could get for you. I couldn't do that. And - If I remember correctly, I'm pretty sure you made it clear you wanted nothing to do with me"_

_"__I didn't choose Ben over you because of who he is or who his family is. You only wanted girls for sex. And you also didn't make it a secret that you wanted to be with Adrian"_

Ricky sighed and ran a hand through his face. _"I'm not going to lie Amy, Adrian was exactly the type of girls I went for. She made it very well known that she was into me - she was a sure thing. You, you were different. So different Amy. I never knew what you were really thinking. I was never sure about how you really felt about me. Even when we were together, I was scared that one day you would just realize you made a mistake by choosing me or that something better will come along and then you would be gone. Every time we fought, I thought – what if she left? What if she never came back? What if she realize I'm not worth it?" _Ricky paused before continuing _"I left because I had to feel like I was the one who could walk away from the relationship. I was afraid of being the one who got left behind…or worst – that you would stay with me and then end of up regretting your life down the road because of it. I didn't want you to resent me for not being able to live out the life you'd wanted for yourself"_

_"__Ricky…I – I had no idea, I wish you could have told me."_

_"__It doesn't matter_" he said, shaking his head. _"The point is, I should have never walked away, it was such a coward thing to do." _This time he took hold of one of her hand and held it. He stared at it while he spoke. _"I knew what you had to go through with your parents, seeing them fight all the time. I hate myself for putting you through it too. I should have held you and told you how much you meant to me. I should have been the one to apologize every time. I'm so sorry Amy. A hundred times over, I'm sorry_"

He got up to stand in front of her. He reached down and swept part of her bangs away from her face with a finger, tucking the longer strands behind her ear.

Amy shut her eyes. God he needs to stop doing that to her.

"_I'm sorry, maybe I pushed you away. I'm sorry I left" _She whispered, her eyes closed.

_"__Amy, you didn't do anything. And don't you dare apologize for Hudson_"

"_I was angry I thought maybe secretly you didn't want to be with me. That you were just forcing yourself_…" She opened her eyes and looked up at him.

"_This guy_?" He whispered chuckling a little to ease the tension. _"No one can force this guy into anything_"

Amy couldn't find the humor in the situation. She continued on just as solemnly"_ I guess I was trying to test you. I picked fights to see if you would stay and choose me or…maybe I was a little irrational sometimes"_ She looked away from him.

_"__What? You irrational? If you're talking about the Fourth of July themed wedding – I mean who doesn't want that? The whole June wedding is so over rated" _Though he attempted to bring light to the situation, his tone was still hushed. Almost as though he was afraid to breathe. He was afraid Amy would tell him to leave – that she didn't want this as bad as he did. He wanted her. He wanted her so bad. A thought occurred to him then as he suddenly realized something. He realized how good it felt to finally admit to himself how much he really wanted Amy. To not hold it in any longer. It felt, freeing. Fear of rejection be damned.

_ "__Ricky stop, it's not funny"_

Ricky sighed. He cupped her cheek with one hand and brushed his thumb over the fresh tears running down her face. _"I know I just… don't ever think any of it was your fault. You have nothing to be sorry for. I was so stupid, and immature. I didn't like who I was. Then I met you and I thought maybe I can I don't know – be better. I wanted to change, I wanted to be better…for you. Then there you were, cheering me on. Challenging me to do things I never thought I could do. You were the only person who actually believed in me…and then something would happen and I would just let you down. It made me like I didn't deserve your trust. That I wasn't good enough for you" _

Amy looked at him, almost aghast. She couldn't believe what she was hearing _"Ricky, you really don't give yourself enough credit" _

_"__I'm working on it" _He said giving her a sad smile. He knew that was part of his problem. That he didn't believe in himself enough. But he couldn't use that as an excuse anymore to keep screwing up. Eventually you had to do something about all your mistakes, otherwise, well where's the growth in that? – His therapist would say.

For a few moments neither of them said anything.

_"__I don't know what to say"_ she whispered, overcome with emotion and what this all meant, her eyes again filling up with fresh tears. So many things unspoken between them. All these misunderstandings, that led them away from each other.

Ricky pulled her in for a hug, wrapping his arms around her he held her against his chest. He pressed a kiss to the side of her head. He had only meant to comfort her. But, then it was as if he was magnetized to her, he needed to hold her closer. He tightened his hold on her, and shifted his head, burying his face into her neck. "_God I missed you_" he whispered into her skin. And then, he couldn't hold himself back any longer. He started placing small kisses on her neck over and over. He heard Amy sigh as he trailed his kisses upwards until his lips found hers.

Amy couldn't help herself then, she placed her hands behind his neck pulling him in to kiss him back. It took Ricky a second to respond at first, but then, as though it was even possible he tightened his hold around her even more and deepened the kiss. A few minutes later they had finally came up for air.

"_Give me another chance. I know I don't deserve it but give me a chance to prove myself to you_" He whispered, gasping, still out of breath, his nose brushing against hers. _"I promise I will never walk away from you ever again"_

She pulled him in for another kiss, until they were gasping for air yet again.

"_I missed you so much Amy_" He said as he looked at her and made a move to kiss her forehead.

She leaned forward so that her head was now touching his. "_I missed you too Ricky. I tried to fight it, god knows I did…" _She said as she closed her eyes.

He wouldn't let her finish because his mouth had found hers again.

*END*

**I'd love to hear your thoughts about this story/chapter. I know there are some unanswered issues. I will be adding an epilogue (or two) which is currently being written. Thanks for reading :)**


	30. Chapter 30

The sun was just rising when Ricky felt Amy stir beside him in the bed they now shared in her apartment. He had gotten up a few minutes before and he was careful not to disturb her from her sleep. He laid there just admiring her. Here she was, the first girl to ever say no to him. The first girl to ever make him wait.

He was such as an ass to her back then. He recalled a conversation they had when Amy was telling him she didn't want to feel pressure to have sex, that she had wanted to wait until it felt right. "_Oh? Well suppose we had an agreement that until it's right then I can do whatever I want_" he had said frustrated.

"_You can do whatever you want Ricky. I promise that for the rest of our lives you can always do whatever you want. You just can't do whatever you want and be with me_". The first girl to ever really challenge him to become the man he'd always wanted to be.

_"__Morning_" Ricky whispered from behind her, his mouth pressed against her neck when he heard her sigh, meaning she had also woken up. She shifted onto her back to face him. "_Hey_" She smiled, looking up at him as he hovered over her.

"_Hey_" he replied smiling, his voice deep from sleep as he looked down at her, his face full of admiration for the woman lying beside him. Moments later he was trailing soft kisses down to her stomach lifting her shirt up revealing the surgery scar above her right hip. He placed a soft kiss there upon seeing it. He remembered the day Amy had gotten the phone call to come back in saying they finally had some news regarding her test results. She had let him come in with her, inside the examination room, much to both his and her doctor's surprise. He held her hand, as she sat on the examination table while the doctor showed them some images against a light wall. "Okay Amy, _I'm going to tell you what I see here_" She began, and Amy squeezed his hand.

After the day Ricky had gone with her to the doctors, they had finally caught the small ovarian cyst that was causing most of Amy's symptoms. At first, they weren't sure if the cyst was what was causing the problem.

"_Either it was so small before or hiding, which is why we haven't caught it. Or the cyst and your symptoms could be completely unrelated. The cyst could be a new occurrence that we just happened to have caught by chance because of all those test did. Ovarian cyst as small as yours usually don't cause any symptoms. They __**can**__ cause the symptoms you have been experiencing but those are usually in the most severe cases where immediate medical attention is required and calls for immediate surgery."_

Regardless, it was a cyst – which needed to be taken care of either way. They waited a few weeks, to see if the cyst will go away on its own. Cyst that size frequently did, she had told them. However when she came back for an ultra sound, it appears that cyst had grown in size. Less than a month later, she was scheduled in for surgery. They had made a small incision in the right side of her abdomen in order to go in for a biopsy.

Soon after the surgery, her symptoms disappeared to the complete shock of her doctor. "_I still don't believe it_", she had said. "_I was almost certain that they weren't related. That may have been the oddest case I've seen yet. The only explanation was that it would grow and shrink. So if it had shrunk or gone away while you've had your tests, it could explain why nothing has ever shown up in the previous scans and why you're symptoms would come on and off"_

He gently brushed a thumb over the raised scar, relief washing through him yet again to finally have that whole ordeal behind them, before pressing one final kiss on it.

Amy kept her eyes closed, enjoying being kissed. She placed one hand on top of Ricky's head and weaved her fingers through his messy hair.

"_Merry Christmas_" he said, as he was back kissing her neck and then giving her a peck on the lips.

"_Merry Christmas Ricky_" she said as she opened her eyes to look at him. She moved her fingers to play with the short strands of hair behind his left ear.

_"__Maybe you want your present now?"_ He whispered coyly, looking at her suggestively.

_"__If it's what I suspect it is, I'm not sure if we have time for my present_" She laughed, as she heard movement from the second bedroom.

Ricky gave her a kiss and shifted himself of her chuckling in his deep tone, and seconds later, John has burst into her room…well now their room. Ricky hasn't officially moved in but he and John has rarely stayed in Ricky's apartment. It's currently more of a storage area for all things that didn't fit in Amy's apartment.

""_MOMMY! DADDY! Get Up, It's Christmas!"_ He yelled as he ran towards their bed and climbed on. "_Can we open the presents?_" He had climbed on Ricky's side and was shaking him by the arm.

Ricky grabbed him with one arm and flipped him towards the middle of the bed, so he was between himself and Amy.

"_What presents buddy? I don't think Santa came"_ He joked.

"_Ricky! That's terrible"_ Amy exclaimed. "_Of course he came honey"_

"_Daddy stop being silly. Or maybe Santa just didn't get you a present because you're naughty_" John said teasing his dad back pointing a finger at him, and squinting his eyes to show him in his 7 year old way that he was not amused.

"_Am I?"_ Ricky asked raising his brow but to Amy instead of John, grinning as he looked at her.

Stop it, she mouthed back. Almost giving him a glaring look, but smiled and shook her head.

_"__Does Mommy think I'm naughty?"_ He pressed on.

_"__I don't know. Why don't we go see what Santa thinks_" she said quickly shaking her head almost in disbelief as she made a move to get off the bed. He was absolutely ridiculous she thought, despite also feeling a little giddy.

_"__Presents!"_ John exclaimed, getting up on the bed and jumping up and down.

Ricky grabbed John and carried him over his shoulder after he had gotten up on his side of the bed, throwing an already excited John into fits of giggles.

_"__Alright come up buddy_" He said patting his reindeer covered bum. "_Let's go open presents"._ John let out a loud squeal causing both him and Amy to laugh as the three made their way towards the decked out tree in the living room.


	31. Chapter 31

**New Years**

Ricky walked into their bedroom after he had finished getting John ready in his party clothes. George had closed down the restaurant early to host a New Year's Eve bash for all their family and friends, which included almost all of their crowd from high school. Mostly it was because their parents all knew each other. That was the thing with living in a pretty small community in LA. Everyone was connected to each other in one way or other.

He stood right behind Amy who was fixing her hair in front of the mirror.

"_You look beautiful"_ He said walking towards her

He bent his knees so he could wrap his arms around her waist and turned his head to give her a kiss on the cheek, then pressed his lips against her right ear.

"_Let's tell everyone tonight you're pregnant_" He whispered jokingly, his voice low and deep. Just saying it gave him butterflies in his stomach.

Amy just rolled her eyes and continue to wrap strands of her hair around the curling iron. "_Let's not_"

"_You know, John is getting pretty old – we better work on getting him a sibling sooner than later before he gets too old to enjoy them"_ He moved his hands which were still around her waist and put a hand on top of her flat stomach.

_"__Pretty old Ricky? He's getting older, but he's hardly 'pretty old'" _

Leave it to Amy to correct his figure of speech. '_Close the lights?'_ She would say to him_, 'you can't 'CLOSE the lights' you CAN switch them off_.'

"_Whatever you know what I mean. We don't want him to be an only child forever_" He gave her another peck this time on the neck.

_"__The things we deprive our child of. How is it that no one has ever called children's aid on us yet_?" She said with a smirk, making eye contact with him through the mirror.

"_Okay, but let's be serious for a sec. We're both done school, we each make a pretty decent amount_…"

"…_we're both still actually pretty young, we're not married"_ she said cutting him off, continuing in the same tone of voice he was using. Always the voice of reason and practicality.

_"__Oh man"_ Ricky said, trying to give his best disappointed, 'oh shucks' tone _"I knew I __**shouldn't**__ have gone with that coffee table book for Christmas. I only had seconds to decide, the store was closing and I panicked. It was the rock, or the book…" _He loved this back and forth banter thing they did with each other.

_"__Ha ha"_ She said, although she had to admit, she was a little amused. She finished curling the last strand of hair. She shut the iron off and carefully placed it down on its handle before turning to face him.

"_I love my book"_ She said wrapping her arms around his neck and looking up at him, kissing his chin. He had given her a hard cover book, The Best of Times Magazine. It contained all the monumental Time's covers, photographs, and award winning articles ever published on the Times, including its very first publication.

"_Well I'm glad to hear it_" He bent his head down to kiss her on the lips and she kissed him back.

She pulled back after a minute "_We better get going, we're already late as it is"_

Ricky groaned but turned towards the door, taking her hand. Amy stood solidly where she was and pulled Ricky back towards her.

Ricky looked at her with a look that was partly curious partly amused. She turned her head as if to kiss him on the cheek but placed her lips by his ear "_But maybe next new year's eve party we can make that announcement_" She whispered teasingly.

His eyes involuntarily shut at her words. It was a mixture of what she said and the way she said it. "_Damn you're sexy_" He said in a low grumble, burying his face into her neck and then kissing it.

"_Okay but seriously we should go"_ She chuckled, pulling away from him. She grabbed his hand pulled him towards the door. This woman was going to be the death of him.

"_You were the one who took forever in the shower to…you know_…." He trailed off grinning, reminding her of the shower they took together while John was napping. He usually never took naps, but because it was going to be a long night for him they decided to make sure he rested in the afternoon – much to his protest.

She looked back only to glare at him, causing him to let out a flirtatious chuckle. _"Shampoo your hair…I was going to say you took forever to shampoo your hair"_ He finished

Again she had no other response than to roll her eyes and shake her head.

They walked out to the living room were John was drawing on the coffee table, with the T.V on in front of him.

She noticed John's feet were hidden in his pant leg, the pants were new and were a bit long.

"_What going on here?"_ Amy asked bending beside John and tugging at the bottom of his pants which were practically dragging on the floor.

_"__I told you these pants are too long for me!"_ John said to his dad, but not looking up from his colouring.

"_They were the ones you put out with the rest of his outfit_" He said to Amy

_"__Yeah well you're supposed to roll them Ricky not just leave them so it's dragging under his feet_" This exchange was also becoming a regular with them. She would complain about trivial things and Ricky would pledge ignorance. She hated that she was starting to sound more and more like a 'mother' but sometimes the words would just come out of her without knowing. Sometimes she would groan at herself after realizing what she had just said.

_"__Oh well whatever, I didn't know"_ He said with a nonchalant shrug regarding John's pants, and went to grab all of their coats out of the closet, while Amy fixed John's pant legs. Ricky however didn't mind. In fact it was one of the things she loved about her. It gave him a sense that someone was looking out for them, besides she always turned out to be right. "_I'm such a nag" _She once said out loud, just as she was getting into bed one night. "Y_ou're a gorgeous hot young mom is what you are_" He replied winking at her.

"_I'd hate to see the outfits you've sent him to school in"_ She said only half kidding, helping John up on his feet. _"Come on buddy we have to go" _

Finally, the three of them walked out of the apartment and headed to the party, 30 minutes behind schedule.

*** Note: I'm going to consider this story completed. But I might add another fun chapter again. I can't seem to let this story go yet for some reason.***


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